The Joker

The "Boo Boo" Report

2006-12-25T08:41:00.000+03:00

The Financial Audit Court and its accounts for 2005 was fresh air for this damp year. We're glad to see it, and glad to discuss openly where the public money is being spent.

I haven't read the entire report, but I would like to point out a couple of points that would make 2006's report even more astonishing.

First of all, its peculiar that the financial audit court reports to the royal court. I think it should report to parliment (not this one), remidied from there, and then the issue is escalated to the King. The annual report should not overtake legistlation in my opinion.

The report did not cover public lands, which is the biggest area of concernt right now.

The report was prepared in June. Presenting it around christmas minimizes the findings, since there is a time lag between June and December. Maybe it was to avoid a hectic elections season or something, but hopefully next year its going to be more timely.

The big Enchilada of that report was the Formula 1, just like GOSI was the hot potato a couple of years ago. Now can we take this issue a step further and investigate whether some of these grand projects are actually expecting returns based on solid feasiblity studies, or are they individualistic aspirations? The reason I say this is because there are lots of mega projects in the pipeline; namely, a golf course, a desert spa, a financial wharf, a business district, theme parks, a foodcourt lagoon, and the four seasons hotel to name a few. Its unimaginable if one of these mega projects goes bust and the government has to pick up the tab.

The people that worked on this report must be applauded. Thank you once again. Much respect!

Tall Flower Syndrome

2006-11-07T17:05:00.000+03:00

Some time around the 7th century BC, a tyrant called Periander just took over a city after a lengthy war.

He sent a messenger to his ally, Thrasybulus, asking for advice on ruling. Without saying a word, Thrasybulus takes the messenger out to the garden and starts cutting off the tops of the taller ears of corns and poppies by swinging his stick.

Periander started a pre-emptive death order on anyone that stood out of the crowd and seemed like they could one day challenge his power.

What airline?

2006-10-17T09:50:00.000+03:00

A guy sitting at a bar at Heathrow Terminal 3 noticed a really beautiful woman sitting next to him.

He thought to himself: "Wow, she's so gorgeous she must be a flight attendant. But which airline does she work for?"

Hoping to pick her up, he approached towards her and said the Delta Airline slogan: "Love to fly and it shows?"

She gave him a confused look and he immediately thought to himself:
"Damn, she doesn't work for Delta Airlines."

A moment later, another slogan popped into his head. He leaned towards her again, "Something special in the air?"

She gave him the same confused look. He then removed Singapore Airlines off the list.

Next he tried the Thai Airways slogan: "Smooth as Silk."

This time the woman turned to him "What the F*$K do you want?"

The man smiled, then lay back in his chair, and said "Ahhhhh, Gulf Air!"

Help me find this poem

2006-09-30T23:12:00.000+03:00

A long time ago, I read a poem in arabic written by the Iraqi poet Ahmed Matar. I don't remember the name of that poem, or where I read it. The most memorable part of that poem was basically a man yelling at his wife like so ;

SHUT UP! Not Another Word! I'm trying to write an article about freedom of speech!

if anyone knows the poem I'm talking about... please let me know. Have a nice day.

Are you loyal?

2006-09-18T09:31:00.000+03:00

Uncovering treason in the last couple of months has been more common than summer wasps! Every day, a master mind plot is stopped at its brink; like the terrorist cell that wants to go to Afghanistan, the Sudanese/British advisor/spy, the mysterious home buyers of Persian origin in Muharraq, the naturalization of scores of immigrants on a “who wants to be Bahraini?” basis, and last but certainly not least, the petition that went to the UN or the FIFA or wherever.

Has everyone gone paranoid? Everyone is accusing everyone else with ridiculous accusations. So what if someone wants to buy a home in Muharraq, or write a report about elections, or send a love letter to Kofi Annan?

I think we’re being very insecure about our loyalty. And I honestly don’t know why they’re worried about the elections being swayed, like parliament is able to do anything anyway.

Buildings

2006-09-06T09:14:00.000+03:00

The real estate sector in Bahrain boomed and echo-boomed in the last couple of years. Now I don’t know if this phenomenon is the result of property owners trying so hard to put their offerings on the market while its still hot, but most of the new buildings do not suit, in design and location, their purpose.

These are examples of buildings which I think should be renovated into different facilities.

A’ali Mall:

The building is very elegant, retains the local experience, and the location is the most valuable on the Island. On the other hand, it does not have open corridors, but a rather star-shaped design which makes it hard for impulse shoppers to get around. If I was a business owner, I wouldn’t set a shop in that maze.

I think that building should be turned into a museum of modern arts. The kind of people that will go there will be the kind that is really dedicated to the cause. I think they will enjoy losing themselves in that intricate structure.

Bahrain Financial Harbor

I don’t know if the promoters realized this already, but Investment Banks, or private banks really emphasize on the “PRIVATE” bit. That’s why they’re incorporated under laws that value confidentiality like Switzerland and the Cayman Islands. So I don’t think they’ll be very eager to come to the center of Manama, right under the spot light, since their customers want privacy first and for most. Besides, these banks probably don’t want to be next to each other, since all their competitors can see who walks in and out of their office and try to solicit business.

I think the two towers should turn into luxury hotels. The nice connector between the two buildings can make a very nice lobby, with restaurants on the sea side. You can get rid of the “Financial” aspect and call it the Bahrain Harbor. I think the gem will be piano or jazz lounges on the top floors. One with a view of the sea, and the other with a view of the old city of Manama.

The Al Fateh Library

I don’t have a problem with the library they’re constructing in Juffair, next to the Al Fateh Mosque. I just think the building is so beautiful to serve as a library by the sea.
If the project managers built that construction out of the ambit of the grand mosque, and closer to the sea, it would make a very nice opera house, like the one in Sydney. Just imagine.

Not worthy

2006-06-18T06:29:00.000+03:00

With the war on terror over the world, the war on drugs in south america, the war on unemployment, and the war on batelco locally.. its a bit of a challenge to notice little details... words that are thrown around by the media.. just to inflate a story maybe.. or make it sound thrilling.. but the subliminal effect they have goes under the radar.

Last week... all over the news.. "Abu-Musaab Al Zarqawi was assassinated".... there was an air raid and "he was assassinated"... "the forces assassinated Al Zarqawi..."

NO HE WAS NOT!

MARTIN LUTHER KING was assassinated...

JAMAL ABDUL NASSER was assassinated

JOHN LENNON was assassinated...

That fat looney got killed! I don't think he was worth being called assassinated.

Does this sound right?

2006-06-15T01:35:00.000+03:00

Does any of you remember an ad in GDN one month ago calling for models of all shapes and sizes? The fronting company was called 8th wonder.

Well apparently, what this company wants to do is select 10 decent looking girls, take them to the Ibiza party at the gulf hotel next thursday.. and their job between 9 pm and 2 am is collecting business cards from wealthy lonely men.

Now I don't know about you folks.. but to me.. this sounds very wrong! Thats whoring with your clothes on...

But then again.. this jurisdiction has always been a balance of double standards.

Indentured Servant

2006-05-14T15:22:00.000+03:00

Back in the 1700's, when Europe needed people for Labor-intensive cash crops in the new world, and they needed more slaves than they can get, a form of contract was used called "Indentured Servant." Basically the system was a needy person would sign a contract to work without pay for a tenure (usually 7 years) in exchange for the "ride" across the atlantic.. plus food and maybe a shared room.. just to keep them going.

That was what I immediately thought of when batelco whipped out their "generous" offers. I'm very shallow in technical hi tech stuff... but I'm not dumb enough to buy their scam. In fact, them offering the first package was infair in itself.. we were corporate slaves conforming to what that communist company spit at us. Now they, unilaterally, play with their unfair rates.. based on.. "get this"-> the (Yes Sir) research center found out that most Bahrainis don't really need unlimited internet. Thank you for your obvious concern about our personal finances, but don't you think that if that was true, people would've switched back to dial up or the other limited package?

And here is another thought that your pricing analysts might have missed.. when you have a higher speed internet (its about fucking time) YOU DOWNLOAD MORE SHIT! and when you download bigger shit.. you get a BIGGER BILL! What? The figures from 1995 don't seem to show it?

Wire splitters.. people that share a line hurt your profits.. I understand... but who are you to read the verdict and lay down collective punishment? Please sue their pants off in court. While you're at it, you might want to review your prices.. its a major influence on usually law-abiding honest people to shoplift some connection.

Cannibal Racism

2006-04-29T03:09:00.000+03:00

If I was in 1975 south africa and a policeman asked me to leave a private institution because of my color.. I would understand... doesn't make it right.. but I'd know where he is coming from. When I am in my country, doing no wrong, and someone that shares my color and my language starts feeling uncomfortable because of my presence... we sort of have a problem.

Its not like I have a striking story to share.. its just a wierd encounter that happens from time to time. I was at a party organized by some friends that are kicking off a new salsa class on the island.. and they invited me to celebrate at a higher end night club, which they reserved for the occasion. I was there with my merry friends having a good time.. half of us was on the dance floor and the other half was socializing.. I got up to do whatever I got up to do... and the club's lebanonise manager came up to me and said "excuse me.. this is a private section." I wouldn't have disclosed the manager's nationality if the case was different... but it was really wierd.. is it because of my complexion that I couldnt possibly have white friends? I mean.. what is he saying exactly? You're Bahraini.. stick to your halwa, bukhoor, and shisha; and leave the salsa parties to others? Or is he saying you're a local, so all I expect from you is trouble?

After I told him that I was invited to the private event.. he apologized with a half heart.

Why do we look down on each other? Why do we trust a foreign doctor more than a local? Prefer to hire someone from abroad when our neighbor is readily available? Do we not believe in ourselves to the point that anyone other than ourselves is alluringly exotic?

Witch Hunt

2006-04-24T23:31:00.000+03:00

As to you, horribe MP's, your little game of witch hunt before election time is pretty obvious. What were you thinking parading with that Slayer shirt? That band had a moderate fan base with heavy metal fans to begin with.. if anything you're helping them resurface! You could've at least used Mega Death or Metallica! Who blames you.. after the joint you rolled up and the pill you chased it down with last session.

The good people of Bahrain put you in that chamber so you can fix what needs fixing.. any other popularity stunt would've been fine if the idea, even though fictional, affected us directly in a positive way... but running around yelling "THE DINGO IS GONNA EAT YOUR BABY!" is a cheap shot. Next time I see a teenager bowing down on a pentacle yelling "We are not worthy", I will vote you back in office.

Witch Hunt

2006-04-24T22:37:00.000+03:00

We have Satanists in Bahrain? HORSE SHIT! Satan can't be anywhere near this territory.. if he was.. he would be fucking unemployed! His job is done for him.. as a matter of fact, he is outshined.. what worse can he do? We have a cult that wants to whip asses and chop off hands at their own discretion in power, people burning tires and powerplants in their local villages, and Michael Jackson lives in a beach house while honest law-abiding citizens look for empty cans in the trash.... what can that Amatuer add? Envy, gluttony, pride, greed, and sloth? Go work on your gig, boy!

As to you, horribe MP's, your little game of witch hunt before election time is pretty obvious. What were you thinking parading with that Slayer shirt? That band had a moderate fan base with heavy metal fans to begin with.. if anything you're helping them resurface! You could've at least used Mega Death or Metallica! Who blames you.. after the joint you rolled up and the pill you chased it down with last session.

The good people of Bahrain put you in that chamber so you can fix what needs fixing.. any other popularity stunt would've been fine if the idea, even though fictional, affected us directly in a positive way... but running around yelling "THE DINGO IS GONNA EAT YOUR BABY!" is a cheap shot.

Next time I see a teenager bowing down on a pentacle yelling "We are not worthy", I will vote you back in office.

what it means to be bahraini

2006-04-02T00:08:00.000+03:00

What it means to be Bahraini:

It means that you stand in line, and people cut in front of you, but its OK.. they're more V.I.P. than you.

Your voice counts when you support the government.. but its oblivion when you don't.

you're a very neutral person in public.. but you're very racist when you're with your friends.

you're very good at telling whats wrong.. but you somehow have a hard time telling whats right.

you can play both sides for the middle.

You blame others (neutralized citizens) for all your problems, and never thought once of progress.

You scream off the top of your lungs "Come and save us U.N." but you stand agains womens' roghts, minority's rights, and freedom of speech.

Interviewing

2006-03-14T19:12:00.000+03:00

Today I went to a job interview. A year and a half ago, I was at a job interview. Lets call today's interview A, and the prior one B. I would like to contrast the two experiences:

Interview A: On time.

Interview B: 45 minutes late.

Interview A: Asked about finance, investments, economics, and the movement of the markets.

Interview B: Asked who I knew in the bank... who my father was.. and if he knew him or not.

Interview A: One person asked the questions, two people were jotting down notes.

Interview B: Checking his email and taking phone calls during the interview.

Interview A: Called me up for a certain position, but decided to talk about a higher position during the interview.

Interview B: Said that this company is crap... I'm just wasting my time.. they don't pay well.

Interview A: Offered to buy me lunch the next day, to discuss things more.

Interview B: Sent me a rejection letter without giving me a test.

Interview A: World class bank.

Interview B: Local bank.

Interview A: Expat.

Interview B: Bahraini.

Its about time

2006-03-06T06:17:00.000+03:00

I give credit where credit is due. I am very impressed with the "Spring of Culture", a month-long festival of daily events from musicals, dance, art, theatre.. etc.

I've always argued that this type of publicity is lacking in the area... We get into rat races about Dubai building the tallest building, Bahrain hosting a motor race, Qatar financing the biggest project... but historians think ancient Greece was great not because of their high buildings, but because of their philosophers and thinkers that were ahead of other civilizations that even came after them.

Unfortunately, I didn't attend any of the event because I was extremely busy lately... I should've at least attended a play that was produced by one of my distant relatives.. but if this tells us anything its that the Ministry of Information can be of great benefit if it was utilized in the right channel. I strongly support a semi-governmental commission in charge of setting a cultural foundation.. that gives this country an edge in a region that is extremely lacking.

On a similar note... I was in Amsterdam last week.. and if you're ever there or somewhere near that city please try your best to catch a show called Boom Chicago at the Liedsplien theatre. Its an improv comedy theatre started by a group of americans on a graduation tour after drama school...and thirteen years later its as witty and sharp.

Welcome Home

2006-02-22T15:45:00.000+03:00

This was published by the LA Times.

A Bittersweet Return to an Unfamiliar Homeland

After 25 years of yearning in exile, a Bahraini fears he won't find peace on the island. But his daughter is determined to make the nation her own.By Megan K. Stack, Times Staff Writer
MANAMA, Bahrain — The father and daughter get lost a lot. He can't remember the sleepy streets of this tiny island nation in the Persian Gulf, not after so many years. As for her, she never knew them.They sit side by side in the darkness of their little Honda, the brake lights of passing cars washing their faces in red. Their eyes quiver over gates and signposts. They are looking for a landmark.

"Isn't it back the other way?" Hussain Ali asks his daughter. "I think … " begins 23-year-old Batoul, then falls silent. It's yet another moment of disorientation for a family that has lived through a quarter of a century in political exile.In the long years since Hussain Ali was arrested, beaten and told to leave Bahrain for criticizing the rulers, he has drifted from one foreign land to the next; pushed a fake passport over immigration counters; killed cockroaches in cheap apartments. He raised his children on dreams of a lost homeland, a place where they would be drenched in sunshine and cherished by a family they hadn't met.Between this father and daughter lives the hope and yearning of exile, and the struggle of generations of Middle Easterners to change — or just make peace with — their homelands. Hussain is afraid that Bahrain will break his daughter's heart, but he's willing to watch her take the risk.

A new king, Sheik Hamed ibn Isa Khalifa, came to power in 1999. He offered amnesty to political exiles. With talk of elections and a new constitution, the king held out the promise of reform — that sweet and elusive notion that taunts this region like a mirage. So the Alis came home. Or so they thought. For Hussain, 52, homecoming has brought heartbreak. He is haunted by memories of lost days, angered by a sense that he's been defrauded.Now he wonders whether he should stay, or give up on Bahrain. His wife couldn't take it here; she has already returned to Canada. But the father and daughter are sticking it out, sharing a room in a relative's house and soaking in the politics of the place.

Earlier this evening, they attended a raucous seminar on corruption and government confiscation of land. The angry crowd cursed the ruling family, "Khalifa, go from here!" Batoul sat pertly, and took careful notes. Her father brooded."I'm not convinced this is enough. Seminars, sitting and talking," he says in the car on the way home. "This government has to go to hell."

All her life, Batoul has been told she belongs here, and it seems impossible to disappoint her. She finds beauty everywhere — in the drabbest streets, the dirtiest cats, the flattest light of a desert noon. "I don't stay because I like it," Batoul says. "I stay because I have to. It's my country, bitter or sweet."Her father just keeps driving through the darkness.

The Alis are Ajam, literally non-Arabs or foreigners, a word used to describe Bahraini Shiite Muslims whose bloodlines stretch back to Iran. Although Ajam families have lived in Bahrain for generations and Shiites are a majority in the country, they have had to fight for passports, housing and job opportunities. Even today, discrimination lingers. Hussain was 26 when he ran afoul of the ruling Sunni Arabs. He wrote a newspaper article criticizing discrimination against the Ajam. After that, he says, he was promptly arrested, interrogated and badly beaten. His wounds festered and left him hard of hearing. After weeks in prison, he was given a temporary travel document — like many Ajam, he had no passport — and warned to flee. He stole away when the house was empty; he wanted his family to be able to say, honestly, that they didn't know where he'd gone."When the plane takes off, you give that last look to your country," he says. "I thought maybe it would be four or five years."He falls quiet, and looks at the floor. When he speaks again his voice is husky."

There were demonstrations then," he says. "Everybody had hope that things would change … " He trails off, clears his throat and blinks. He landed in India, found work showing Arab tourists around and bought a forged Saudi passport. He was lonesome, so he called a girl he'd known in Bahrain and asked her to marry him. She was 16 years old. He told her the truth: He didn't love her yet, but he would. She agreed and flew to India, where the couple signed a wedding contract. There was nobody to celebrate with them, and no money for a honeymoon. They went out to breakfast and began their life together.

Batoul was their firstborn. Their second daughter was scalded in a running bath one dreary afternoon. She suffered third-degree burns all over her body and died in her father's arms. They buried her in India, heavy with a grief as solitary as their joy."

The important thing about weddings and funerals are the people who come to be with you, in happiness and sadness," Hussain says. "Nobody came to us." Every six months or so, his mother would call from a series of pay phones. She'd talk for a few minutes, then hang up and move to another telephone, terrified of catching the attention of security agents. She was always circumspect, always said the same thing: "No news." "You couldn't even talk to her, she just cried," Hussain says. "Sometimes I'd send a message and say, 'Don't do these things anymore. Better I don't hear from you.' "

When the family flew to Montreal in 1985, they had nothing but a $100 bill. Hussain applied for asylum, and they lived on welfare. For years, they scraped for food while Hussain studied telecommunications at night school. When their apartment building burned down on Batoul's seventh birthday, Hussain held his daughter and told her it was an enormous candle lighted just for her.

"My dad says, 'I feel guilty that I did this to you,' " she says, remembering the years of hardship. "But I say, 'No. You made me a fighter.' " At 9, Batoul began to wear a head scarf, encouraged by her mother. The hijab isolated her from her classmates. She was beaten up, kicked in the back, taunted by older boys.When she bared her head for gym class, the barrier melted away. She'd shoot baskets and joke with the other girls, but the camaraderie was short-lived. "As soon as I put the scarf back on," she says, "nobody would talk to me." One day, her math teacher blocked her in the classroom doorway. "You're not coming to class until you take that garbage off your head," he told her. She lost her temper, and heaved her textbook at him. She still refers to high school as a "catastrophe."

Meanwhile, Hussain finished his degree, landed a white-collar job and moved the family to a big house in Ottawa. College was better than high school, but Batoul still felt at sea. She got married, then divorced. She dropped out of college, Bahrain glittering in her imagination."I wasn't satisfied with my life there at all," she says now. "Nothing worked out the way I wanted. I wanted to go home."

The Alis finally made it back to Bahrain in 2003. When they landed, so many people had crammed into the airport that it looked as though somebody famous had arrived. Family members pressed them with flowers, chocolates and money folded into tiny flowers and butterflies. "

You're hugging, you're crying, and you don't even know why," Batoul says. "You feel you're bonded by blood."Hussain was being reintroduced to his brothers, his sisters, the neighbors. "My brother was 5; now he's 32," he says. "I was thinking, 'Who's that guy touching my sister?' and he said, 'I'm her husband.' Things like that."

He found his childhood home destroyed, his bank accounts vanished. His father had publicly disowned him to ease pressure from the government. His wife and son grew disillusioned and flew back to Canada. Batoul went too, but came back this year. "My parents had a certain idea and memory about things," she says. "As wise as you are about life, when it comes to personal things, you can be a child."

Unemployment is rife, but Hussain has found work as a supervisor at a shipyard."What I'm making here, my son can make in a part-time job," Hussain says. "My lawyer came to visit and said, 'Hussain, what are you doing here?' "But there's Batoul. He believes she'll stay."She tells me, 'You grew up in a family. When they tell you "uncle," you know who it is. You played barefoot with your cousins.' She's missing it all the time, like a hug."But she chafes a bit against her conservative family. She misses wearing pants. When she tried to go to the skating rink, her relatives wrung their hands. "It's only for Russians," they told her.

She has found a job as a secretary in an insurance firm. She hasn't made many friends, but she insists that's all right. When she has a quiet minute, she drives to the shore. There, on the outer margins of the land she has claimed from her parents' memory, she looks at the water and tells herself she is home.

hypocricy

2006-02-17T12:19:00.000+03:00

I do not sympathise with terrorists at all. But hating terrorists should not be an excuse to lose our values. The world is calling upon the United States to do something about Guantanamo Bay... and its a very strong argument when new torture pictures start floating around coming from abu ghraib.

Now I find the United States to be very hypocritical in this area of concern. Here they are trying to spread democracy in the region through many different military and non-military channels.. and to crown this new era of democracy in Iraq, namely, they insisted on having Saddam in court.. tried like anyone else... now thats good.. I love that... now can you practice what you preach and have the 500+ prisoners in Guantanamo Bay stand before an independent courtroom, not a military branch? Because right now... what you do and what you say are two different things.

Good service

2006-02-14T17:23:00.000+03:00

I was at an insurance company the past couple of days sorting out some issues, and I was very impressed with their customer service level. I decided to list what are, in my opinion, the best and the worst performers in Bahrain.

Cheers:

1- Ahlia Insurance: The staff is very friendly and cooperative. I asked them for favors out of their job description, and they were more happy to do it. They are very enthusiastic also. If there is one drawback, I noticed that they have somewhat weak product information. The staff had difficulty pricing premiums and different policies got them kind of confused, but over all, very good service.

2- MTC-Vodafone: They are very friendly on the phone and in the store. Their shops are colorful, and their environment is youthful... that gets you relaxed right from the start. Their payment system is kind of wierd... they cut you off as soon as you reach a low limit faster than you can say reconnect.

3- Gulf Hotel: The staff in different functions is very professional. The health club staff are very close friends of mine... and the waiters and bartenders in the hotel are good too.

Jeers:

1- Ahli United Bank: Customer service at its worst. The knuckle heads at the customer service desk are so confused they don't know whether you were coming or going! One time I asked them how long it took them to process a loan knowing that my salary account is with them, I have no other commitment, and my employer is A rated. They said "roughly one month." I don't have an account with BBK and they said they'd do it in less than a week. I have endless stories with AUB... I applied for an internet account around July or august.. still didnt recieve it.

2- Batelco: Their customer service reps just have that "fuck you, what are you gonna do about it?" look on their faces. Hell.. they were the only company in the land.. they can cut you off and you couldn't call and tell anyone about it... Are you thinking of complaining? Oops.. your internet and phone lines have been cut off by mistake.. we'll send our technicians in a silver jubilee celebration.

3- Geant: I mean we're fine with the fact that most of their stuff is crap anyway.. but not willing to accept it is kind of an area of concern. They won't refund their underpriced crap.. I mean everyone knows that if a TV costs less than a pair of boots.. it can't be any good.. Not only that.. the place is WAY understaffed... you can easily wait for a good 30 minutes until someone attends to you.

Disclaimer: please do not sue me

Abu Hamza is in the big house

2006-02-08T11:44:00.000+03:00

Yesterday Abu Hamza got convicted. In case you're wondering why he looks like that, the first day he had his shiney new hook on, he was so comfortable with it that he forgot it was there at all... later that afternoon his eyelid was itching.. OUCH! Should've used the left hand, shaikh abu hamza.. but thats another story...

This is the Itenerary:

Guilty of 6 charges of soliciting to murder
Guilty of 3 charges related to "stirring up racial hatred"
Guilty of 1 charge of owning recordings related to "stirring up racial hatred"
Guilty of 1 charge of possessing "terrorist encyclopaedia"
Not guilty of 3 charges of soliciting to murder
Not guilty of 1 charge related to "stirring up racial hatred"

Now, my area of concern is this guy didn't start yesterday.. in fact.. he was found directly connected to an attack back in 1999 (They're so much now I honestly can't keep track.) Why did the British government look the other way for so long? I am under the impression that if it wasn't for the july 7th bombings, one eyed jack over here would be shooting Danish cows down.

Abu hamza was wanted in Egypt and Yemen for multiple counts.. in EGYPT & YEMEN!! THE MIDDLE EAST IS SICK OF HIM...doesn't that kind of tell you something? Fanatics like him (Saad Faqih & Co) found a warm bed in the UK for a long time... its about time the British government dropped this stupid policy of letting in terrorists as long as their activities are offshore. Its a bad political bargaining strategy that led to bad things.

Here are some facts:

-UK police had interviewed Abu Hamza during 1999 over alleged involvement in terror plots in Yemen, but no charges were brought.

-A police search of the mosque in 2003 led to the discovery of forged passports, CS gas, knives and guns and it was closed down.

-he will be eligible for parole in 2008. (Thats in two years.. you think he'll learn his lesson in two years?)

-Following his arrest, more than 3,000 audio cassettes and 600 videos were found of speeches intended for wider distribution. To go with it, "a terror manual - an encyclopaedia of Afghani Jihad - found at his west London home listed Big Ben, the Eiffel Tower and the Statue of Liberty as possible targets for an attack."

- Abu Hamza was a nightclub bouncer in Soho.

Offbeat: I found a new blog called "Blame it on Bahrain."

Where have all the cowboys gone?

2006-02-02T09:00:00.000+03:00

I have a right to eat Danish cheese and butter and milk and chocolate and all these nice little things... why are some governments banning them? Good people of \"We have a right\".. I have a right to buy Danish stuff... don\'t you agree? Or does your effort only focus on pushing the last call at the bar an hour later?

Liberals in Bahrain and beyond.. I am disappointed with you! I didn\'t talk about this story for a couple of days just hoping against hope that you might wake up and say something.. but the only thing you came up with is \"Oh well we can ask them nicely and they might apologize.\" NO ONE NEEDS TO APOLOGIZE! Someone made fun of Islam.. just make fun of him back... make fun of his religion... make fun of his mother... just please.. don\'t kill him and don\'t take away my cheese.

You can go to a Danish court and file a lawsuit against the guy himself... although the judge is gonna have a laugh and pass the file into the fireplace.. but that\'s something you can do.. but how can you punish the whole country of Denmark, and everyone that enjoys their fine products? And the liberals are standing there like posts.

Long story short... no one needs to apologize... and the liberals should have used this opportunity to explain what freedom of speech is to people that find this concept challenging.

Do something Minister

2006-01-27T17:01:00.000+03:00

Isn't it ironic this cartoon was drawn a while before Michael Jackson's shopping in rags surfaced? I am not really upset about what happened.. MJ can wear 2 inch ear rings and sing songs about ex husbands in downtown manama for all I care... All I'm upset about is the Minister of Information... Dr. Abdul Ghaffar.. the savior of Islam and Idol... the opressor of vice and evil... where is he now?

I'm wondering, Dr Abdul Ghaffar, when AAJ holdings hired MJ as a consultant.. did they get permission from your ministry? Do the laws you made up allow them to do that line of work, keeping in mind that big brother, nanci ajram, hakeem, and every thing else was whisked away?

What happened makes Bahrain look like the zoo of the world.. we bring in lunatics and child molestors and give them big palaces and fancy jobs. That is, of course, you genuinely believe that the actions you took in office were aimed at Bahrain's reputation.

Thats some reputation we got!

Offbeat: Keep one eye on cerebral waste! He's moving into the interviewing business.

Transfer of ownership

2006-01-24T17:13:00.000+03:00

I've seen the mess going on in Kuwait after their ruler died. At this end, I will propose a fool proof system that can be used in the GCC and any other clan government around this nice blue planet. It is more of a balanced score card approach.

First of all, gather all the people that have a family name thats similar to the late king/amir/papa smurf... whatever. Then, play a big game of musical chairs... preferably in the cabinet of ministers, since lots of folks will get seats over there as consolation prizes anyway.. with whats left.. thin out anyone under 60 and without facial hair around the mouth for some reason.. now this is the smart part.. put them through a physical test.. see how fast they can walk on a red carpet from the rolls royce to the airplane, how steady they can wave their hand at delegates, and how much hand-shaking stamina to recieve nose kissers on different occasions.

Choose the top 3.. and the grand winner is the person that has the nicest signature.

PS: Isn't it funny that in bruital Israel, no one assumed power or made speeches on behalf of other people when the prime minister was in the hospital? Checks and balances or balanced score card?

NEW WORDS FOR 2006: Essential vocabulary additions for the workplace (and elsewhere)

2006-01-22T16:33:00.000+03:00

1. BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a Deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

2. SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

3. ASSMOSIS: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.

4. SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.

5. CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles

6. PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

7. MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.

8. SITCOMs: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What Yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.

9. STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.

10. SWIPEOUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.

11. XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.

12. IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles that are Annoying but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The J-Lo and Ben wedding (or not) was a prime example - Michael Jackson, another.

13. PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

14. ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.

15. 404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error Message"404 Not Found," meaning that the requested site could not be located.

16. GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, and subdivisions.

17. OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (Like after hitting send on an email by mistake)

18. WOOFS: Well-Off Older Folks.

19. CROP DUSTING: Surreptitiously passing gas while passing through a Cube Farm.

Who's looking after your children?

2006-01-19T11:10:00.000+03:00

I found this at the Indians in Kuwait website. This is shocking, sick shit! A kuwaiti family hired this house servant, and noticed their son tired and worn out on a daily basis when they come back home. They hid a camera to see what was going on.

http://www.neethu.com/abbasiya

I don't only blame this sick individual.. I blame the slavory system that entitles people in the GCC to fly in brown people from elsewhere and pay them dirt.. fuck this running.. we even trust them with our kids.. are you sure you want to underpay and piss off the person watching over your kids when you're gone?

Valuable Entertainment

2006-01-15T14:11:00.000+03:00

So I got home after they let us out.. we're too sad to work after Sheikh Jaber of Kuwait died, may he rest in peace. I got home around late afternoon and I switched on the TV. There was this big Texan, that looks like a bald Saddam Hussain, calling himself Dr. Phil.

The reason I dislike this Colonel/Psychologist is because he had a family that suffered a pedophile predator attack on their 15 year old daughter... now how the fuck is getting a family, that has suffered enough already, being exploited considered daytime entertainment?! He puts on this serious tone and emphazises the syllabuls like a true healer.. but as soon as the show ends it says in the little fine print "FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY" and "ADVICE GIVEN HERE IS NOT" bla bla bla...

This shit crossed cultures even! Its so popular in the States, where its made, that they air it with captions here! And believe you me, next year.. we will have an Arabic Dr. Phil.. maybe Dr. Fadi or something because these stations can't come up with their own worthless crap.. they rip it off.

Right after the doc waved goodbye to the family he just exploited.. they ran an ad for a show "Joe Millionaire part 2." The premise of this show is to fly in more than a dozen European young ladies.. put them under the impression that an extremely unbearable gentleman is worth 20 million dollars when in reality he has 20 dollars in his account... and the audience gets to watch them battle out their way to what is safe to call bottom of the human barrel.

Why is entertainment so extreme these days? There's a show about ugly ladies getting make overs.. the audience is taken through all these labotomies and face lifts..

I remember back when MTV used to play music.. we enjoyed "full house" back then... why did entertainment get so edgy lately?

Hajj death

2006-01-12T16:59:00.000+03:00

I was going to write about this issue days ago.. but I told myself there has been too much seriousness in the air lately.. so I might as well push it back.. and as soon as I decide to write about this issue, even more of it is floating on the news...

Apparently the death toll has risen up from the 76 figure a week ago, when 50 people died because of a stampede. I didn't get the story yet, but there is one thing I can confirm.. IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME!

The reason its not, is the same old problem.. we surround this event with much holyness and less intervention, thinking that things will take care of themselves. Every year.. people die in the Hajj pilgrimage.. usually from the poorer countries.. because they kind of get the boot over there...

In order for this yearly death tradition to stop, I suggest the following things:

First off, Saudis should be treated like everyone else! They can only go do the pilgrim once every five years, just like any other nationality.. not only for safety reasons, but because Islam says we're all equal.

Second, enough giving responsibilities to people that don't deserve them. Get a professional consultancy organization.. I would suggest the people that organized the olympics in Atlanta and the World Cup in france 98 because of their efficiency... and LISTEN to what they say.. they have experience moving lots of people from point A to point B.

Third, the Asian markets (ie India and China) are experiencing staggering growth rates. Year on year, more and more indians are moving from the lower classes to the middle class because of a wealth boom.. and China speaks for itself these past couple of years.. which means more and more muslims will come for the pilgrim to thank the lord for the extra income they earned.. therefore.. the price tag to go to the holy land should be jacked up in my opinion. In islam, you are only required to perform Hajj if you are able to do so... the trick is to make more people unable, because the space there is limited.. there is just so much capacity. Its not exclusive as a carribian cruise... just a result of the increase in wealth.

I hope next year's Hajj is death free.

Smart Joke

2006-01-09T21:33:00.000+03:00

I got this Joke on my email.. only smart people will get it..

Talking animals

While riding one day, a cowboy met an Indian riding along with a dog and a sheep and he began a conversation. Cowboy: "Hey, nice dog you got there. Mind if I speak to him?"
Indian: "Dog no talk."

Cowboy: "Hey dog, how's it going?"

Dog: "Doin' alright."

Indian:( Look of shock )

Cowboy:"Is this Indian your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian )

Dog: "Yep."

Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."

Indian:( Look of disbelief )

Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

Indian: "Horse no talk."

Cowboy: "Hey horse, how's it going?"

Horse: "Good."

Indian:( Extreme look of shock )

Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian )

Horse: "Yep."

Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in a shed to protect me."

Indian:( Complete look of utter amazement )

Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

Indian: "Sheep liar."

Under rated music

2006-01-07T12:58:00.000+03:00

Lets take a break from all the politics, economics, and social issues today. I will share what, in my opinion, are some of the most under rated bands. They're mostly 80's bands that came and went without a big buzz.

First off, Simple Minds:

First time I ever heard of this scottish band was on "The Breakfast Club's" closing credits. A song called "don't you forget about me" was playing as Judd Nelson ends the movie. I really recommend this song, along with "Waterfront" and "alive and kicking."

Duran Duran was a very famous band. They were video pioneers that made fun of themselves in their videos. But the band broke up and had to change their members a number of times. Over the years, that just unwinded their fan base. Now the band got back together, and they're producing the same quality of music.

Nazareth gets the award for most under rated band. Their first album was in 1971, with two very nice songs, "Red Light Lady" and "The King is dead."

The Dandy Warhols is a band from Portland, Oregon that gained popularity in Europe. They got into the main stream because of the song "Bohemian like you" that was used in lots of advertisements and movies... but they have lots of other nice songs like "We used to be friends," "you were the last high," and they even sang about prophet mohammed.

How to prepare a terrorist in 6 steps

2006-01-03T12:04:00.000+03:00

I read this article somewhere and it was quoted from a famous blog called "Land of the Sand." One of the most powerful articles I read. Nails the 6 points one after the other. Too bad its in arabic and its too long to translate.

كيف تصنع ارهابيا في ستة خطوات؟

عندما غادرت البيت صباح اليوم، خيل لي ان هاتفا من السماء قال لي \" توكل على الله\". أرجو المعذره لقد كان صوتا و ليس تخيلا، ظننت ربما كان المطوع خميس يلعب بمايكرفون المسجد يجرب قدراته الصوتيه الفاشله..ولكن الصوت الذي همس اليّ لم يكن يشبه صوت مطوع خميس العور...كان اشبه بصوت الببغاء الذي يرافق علاء الدين في كارتون ديزنى الشهير

حدث نفس الشيء مرة اخري ، عندما عدت للبيت ، الصوت الببغاوي يقول لي شيئا مثل سبحان الله...قلت لأمي التي كانت في الصاله هل سمعت هذا الصوت..أهو المسجد؟ فتبسمت و اشارت الي علبه بيضاء من البلاستيك ملصقه بأعلى باب الصاله..جربت فتح و اغلاق الباب، وكل مره يصدر من العلبه صوت يقول لك سبحان الله او توكل علي الله...العلبه * الشريره هذه مصنّعة في الصين

هل تعرفون ان الصينيين و الكوريين مارسوا شيئا يسمى زن تزان و هو عباره عن غسيل دماغ منظم ضد اسرى الحرب خلال الحرب الكوريه في الخمسينيات من القرن الماضي..أكتشف الامريكان ان كثيرا من اسرى الحرب بعد تحريرهم قد تغيرت طرق تفكيرهم و بدوا و كأنهم يتعاطفون مع الشيوعيه و منهم من كان يهرب ليعود الي الكوريين
أدي هذا الي ظهور عدة دراسات أهتمت بهذه الظاهره النفسيه و التى استمر الشيوعيون السوفييت بالقيام بها لأقناع اكبر عدد من الشباب حول العالم بالفكر الشيوعي. اتضح من الدراسات ان الكوريين كانوا يعرضون اسراهم الي عمليات غسيل مخ تعتمد على التخويف و العزله و تقليل الوجبات و ترديد الكلام و لعب تسجيلات صوتيه من خلال مكبرات الصوت تلقن الفكر الشيوعي، مما ادى الي انفصال ذهنى لدي الاسرى عن الحقيقه و الطريقه التى تربوا بها و تحولوا الى عقول مغسوله لا تدرك ماذا تفعل..كان الامر يسّهل على الكوريين توفير اعداد اكبر من الرجال للقتال في جبهة المعركه و اقل عدد ممكن من الحراس للسيطره على اسرى الحرب لديهم

أثناء الستينات كثر استخدام الرسائل الخفيه في الاعلانات التجاريه و الاغاني والمسلسلات بحيث تبث رساله سريعه تسمعها الاذن و يلتقطها الاحساس و لكن لايسنح الوقت للجزء التحليلي من الدماغ باكتشافها..يسمى ذلك ب: السابلايم و ان لم تثبت حقيقة تأثيره حتى الان في خضم الكم الهائل من نظريات المؤامره حول هذا الموضوع

كنت اشاهد الانتحاريه العراقيه ساجده عتروس و التى لم ينفجر حزامها الناسف في مجزرة عمّان الدمويه تعترف على شاشة التلفزيون و ربما تسائل الكثيرون عن الكيفيه التى يتمكن بها اسامه بلادين و أبومصعب الدموي و غيرهم من الارهابيين بأقناع هؤلاء بالانتحار..كيف تتمكن هذه المنظمات الارهابيه من السيطرة على العقول و كيف تستغلهم و تتحكم بهم ليقوموا بقتل الابرياء انتحارا؟

لنلقي بعض الضوء على ذلك

ان عمليات غسيل الدماغ للسيطره على العقول ليست جديده على البشريه، فالبشر منذ عهد الكهوف عرفوا ان بقائهم يعتمد على حياتهم في مجموعات تحمى نفسها من الحيوانات المفترسه و للصيد و العمل معا، ذلك خلق الحاجه للقياده و السيطره على المجموعه و استخدامها. أكثر من استعمل اساليب السيطرة على العقول هما الحكومات و الاديان على مر التاريخ، في بلاد الرمال و حتى سقوط الدوله العثمانيه التى كانت تعتبر نفسها خلافة على المسلمين كان الحكام و السلاطين يستغلون الدين و يستعملونه للسيطرة على الجماهير و كان رجال الدين يخضعون لهم يؤلفون لهم الاحاديث و يستنبطون لهم الاحكام من مثل وأطيعوا اولي الامر منكم، و لكن بعد سقوطها قام رجال الدين المسلمين بمحاولات مستمره للاستيلاء على الحكم و الاستئثار به من خلال تأسيس جماعات دينيه مثل الاخوان و السلفيه والتحكم في مناهج المدارس و عقول الناشئه و استغلال حالة الفقر السائد و الفشل للدكتاتوريات العربيه المتساقطه، ليأسسوا حكومة دينيه، و هذا ما يفسر حالة الصمت الدائم من رجال الدين الذين مهما فعل الزرقاويين و البلادينون في اراقة دماء الطفوله و الابرياء من البشر..فلا يكفروهم او ربما يداعبونهم بعبارات لينه..انهم ينتظرون نصيبهم من الكعكه

من الاديان التي تمارس عملية التحول الديني بصورة منظمه و التي ربما اسست قواعد غسل الدماغ و التي استفاد منها الصينيون و الكوريون الشيوعيون ، الدين التاوي و هو احد اديان الصين. يستعمل التاويون اساليب العزله و الصيام و ترديد الاناشيد الببغاويه و اشعار الشخص بأنه لاشيء مقابل الجماعه و انهم الوحيدون الذين معه، لأفراغ عقل الانسان من محتواه و معتقداته ليصبح صفحة بيضاء..يزرعون فيها افكارهم، فيحدث التحول العجيب في فكر هذا الشخص..جماعات الهارى كريشنا و السيانتولوجي تقوم بنفس الاجراء و تسمى هذه الخطوات الست للتحول

الجيوش تمارس عملية غسيل المخ خلال عملية التجنيد و التدريب بالطقوس المتعارف عليها: القصد هو نزع الانسان او الرجل من بيئته، و أقلمته و تغييره الي كائن جديد، كائن مطيع، ينفذ الاوامر، بلا تفكير

أول شيء يتم عمله في جيوش العالم عندما تنضم اليهم هو: حلق شعرك و جعلك تحس بأنك تفقد كل شيء تحبه او تعودت عليه، الجيش يخرجك من حياتك و يغير عقلك، ياتي مدرب الجيش الغبي الفاشل في الدراسه و الخدمه العسكريه ايضا، ليصرخ بك بأن ايام الدلع و الراحه انتهت و هنا مافيش ماما و لا بابا، و يبدأ بالمارشات و الترديد الغبي و الصراخ، و العقاب بالعزله و الحرمان من المجتمع و الحياة التي تعودت عليها، حتى عند الخروج من المعسكر يجب ان تلتزم بلباس معين.. يتوقف عندك التدبير و التفكير تصبح متلقى اوامر و منفذا فقط.. و عند التخرج ..تخرج الي الحياة كشخص مختلف في التفكير و المعتقدات و التصرفات..عسكري

و حتى ، صديقي و صديقتي القارئه، لا تستغربون كثيرا من تصرفات الانتحاريين الاسلاميين و جرأتهم و خلو قلوبهم من اي رحمه، و لتحموا انفسكم و اولادكم و تحرروا عقولكم من سيطرتهم على ادمغتكم يجب ان تعرفوا حقيقة هامه عن البشر ايضا

ثلثي البشر او ربما اكثر يحملون طبيعه انقياديه، يبحثون عن من يقودهم و ينقذهم، لا يستطيعون عمل ذلك بأنفسهم، لاحظوا عندما يردد العرب خطابهم التقليدي مثل أنتظار صلاح الدين، أو معتصماه، أو جمال عبد الناصر، صدام..و يخرجون بمظاهرات بالروح بالدم نفديك ، انهم يبحثون عن من يريحهم من التفكير و يقدم لهم حلولا ساذجه.. من ابيض و أسود

لتتعرف على نماذج من ثلثا البشر هؤلاء، انظر من حولك، سترى انهم الذين يبحثون عن الايمان، عن حقيقة الكون، عن وجود عدالة مطلقه..انهم يحبون الحقائق ناصعة البياض بوضوح الشمس..و هذا لا يعنى انهم ليسوا بأذكياء و لكنهم مثاليين، يضحون بأنفسهم و وقتهم من اجل الغير و يؤمنون بشده بعدالة قضيتهم، انهم متعصبون لفكرتهم، يريدون اصلاح الخطأ و منع الذنوب و تحويل مجتمعهم و بلادهم الي بلاد ملتزمه بالايدولوجيه او الفكره الدينيه التى يؤمنون بها..بحسن نيه لتخليصها من الشرور و تجنيبها غضب اله الرمال

هؤلاء هم يقع فريسة للأرهابيين و يسهل تجنيدهم، هذه الظاهره ليست مقصوره على بلاد الرمال فقط و ربها الساخط في السماء، بل تحدث في اماكن عديده، نمور التاميل استخدمت نفس الاسلوب عندما فجّرت منتحره ، راجيف غاندي رئيس وزراء الهند، و في التسعينيات قامت مجموعه دينيه يابانيه اسمها ايوم شينيركيو بنشر غازات بيولوجيه في ميترو طوكيو تسببت بقتل كثير من المارة الابرياء، هذه المنظمه اليابانيه مثل القاعده كانت تسعى للحصول على اسلحة دمار شامل لتحطيم النظام العالمي ، ربما من المستحيل تماما القضاء على ظاهرة التعصب و الارهاب من هذه الجماعات و لكن في اليابان و المجتمع الغربي حيث تتوافر المعلومات تجدها اقل كثيرا و اقل تأثيرا ،على عكس بلاد الرمال و الصحارى..لماذا؟

سأشرح ذلك لاحقا

: ألخطوه الاولي

تبدأ عملية تحول الانسان الي ارهابي بحادثه او ظاهره، فشل الانسان في الحب او عدم قدرته للتواصل مع فتاة ليحبها، او خيانة صديق او شيء يؤثر في هذا الانسان من قبل العائله فيتركها بحثا عن ملجأ اخر، هذا ماحدث مع اسامه بن لادن الابن الخمسين في بيت خلى من المحبه و العاطفه، و امتلأ بخلافات الاخوة حول السيطره على اموال امبراطورية بن لادن. يتعمق الاحساس بالوحده و يبدأ هذا الشعور بالخيانة و تخلى العائلة و الاصدقاء عنه ، الي تحرير عاطفته من الارتباط بقيمهم و افكارهم

: الخطوة الثانيه

ان يتعرض الشخص مثل ما حدث اسامه بلا دين الي ايديولوجيه متطرفه يعوض فيها انتمائه و يحس تجاهها بالراحه.

الايديولوجيات التى تبحث عن نقاء المجتمع و تجنيبه الذنوب و العقاب مثل السلفيه و الخوارج تهدف الي القيام بتطهير المجتمع مثلهم في هذا مثل البيوريتان في المسيحيه التي تسعي الي الرجوع الي التبسيط الساذج للحياه و لكنها تتلائم مع الفكر المثالي للأنقياديين من ثلثي البشر

: الخطوة الثالثه

وجود قائد له كاريزما مثل الظواهري الذي يبدأ عملية غسل الدماغ و فيها تقوم الجماعه بعزل الشخص عن المجتمع، عزله عن التلفزيون و الموسيقي الكافره و الكتب، كل شيء غير طاهر الا ادبيات الجماعه، تذهب الجماعات الي اماكن معزوله لتقوم بالدرس و التلقين و حتى في امريكا كثيرا ما تجد الجماعات الدينيه الجديده تستأجر موتيلات بعيده لأجتماعاتها مثلما يقيم الجهاديون و السلفيون معسكراتهم في الصحارى، حيث يعلمون الاطفال \" طريقة ذبح الشاه\"

:الخطوة الرابعه

هي بداية اخراج مصطلحات لها دلالات خاصه للجماعه و يبدأ الافراد بالسريه و التحكم بالمعلومات، يستوجب على العضو الان منع نفسه من التفكير في امور معينه و يبنى ايمانه المطلق و يتخلص من اعماله السابقه التى اداها في حياته قبل ان يهبط عليه هذا الايمان الذي فتح الله به قلبه، هذه المرحله يكون الولاء للجماعه فوق كل شيء، فوق الوطن فوق الاهل فوق الاحبه. تستخدم الجماعات الصيام و ترديد الاناشيد و الادعيه بصوره طقوسيه شبيهة بما ذكرته سابقا في التدريب و الاعداد العسكري

: الخطوه الخامسه

نزع شخصية الفرد و التمّيز الفردي لصالح الجماعه، في هذه المرحله تتم مراقبة سلوك العضو و تقييم انتمائه . من الاساليب المتبعه هي اسلوب القرين و هو ان لا يترك اي عضو لحاله لمدة طويله، فهو دائما برفقة عضو اخر يذكر احدهما الاخر بمباديء الجماعه و لمنع الشخص من العوده الي عاداته الماضيه، و من الاساليب المتبعه كذلك التخلص من اسم الشخص واعطائه كنيه مثل ابومحجن و ابو البراء و ابومهبول او ابوملخبط الثوري، و يسمون تجمعاتهم بأسماء من غابر التاريخ مثل سرية ابي كعب المخّبل و غزوة فندق ساس المباركه و يخاطبون بعضهم بعضا بأسم اخونا في الاسلام اخي في الله لتتميز الجماعه و يكتمل فصلها عن المجتمع ، الشيوعيون مثلا كانوا يستخدمون كنية الرفيق او الزميل المناضل رقم سته و اربعين

: الخطوه السادسه

أيجاد الشيطان ! او العدو الذي تصب عليه الجماعة جام حقدها، فالعدو يجب ان يمثل العائق الاول لنجاح الجماعه، فكانت الامبرياليه هي عدو الشيوعيه و بعبعها المكروه، مثل الشيطان الاكبر امريكا و الطاغوتيون للجمهوريه الاسلاميه الخمينيه، كذلك اليهود و النصارى لأبن لادن و القاعده و تصل العمليه الي تفسير القرأن الكريم بطرق غرائبيه مثل و لا الضالين في سورة الحمد حيث تفسر الكلمه بأنهم اليهود و النصارى الذين ضلوا سواء السبيل و هكذا و قد يستهدفون اعوان الشيطان هذا عدوهم من الحكومات او البشر الامنين و يجوزون قتلهم على اساس ان المجتمع كله فاسد او انهم متمترسين اي يختفي الشيطان عدوهم و اعوانه خلفهم. في عملية بناء العداوه و الكراهيه و رفض الاخر تماما، تتم عملية غسل الدماغ

لم يبق لهذا المسكين عضو الجماعه الارهابي خيار سوى ان يقاتل هذا العدو الذي يحول بين جماعته و بين نجاحهم في تحقيق اهدافهم و بناء المجتمع المثالي.. على طريقتهم طبعا

ان عملية انقاذ او انتشال شخص تم غسل دماغه صعب جدا و هي عمليه تتطلب علاجا نفسيا،من اشهر الدراسات في هذا المجال لعالم النفس الامريكي ستيفن الان حسن، الذي كان نفسه ضحية عملية غسل الدماغ على يد جماعه دينيه مسيحيه متشدده انتمى اليها عندما كان في عشريناته تسمى نفسها الكنيسه التوحيديه و قام ستيفن حسن بدراسات كثيره يساعد فيها الاسر التى تم تجنيد احد ابنائها من قبل جماعات دينيه متطرفه

www.freedomofmind.com

العبره التي اود ان اتركها معكم، هو انك طالما حررت عقلك ..و ربطته بالعقلانيه و الواقع و رفضت تصديق الافكار السحريه عن النمله و الهدهد اللذان يتكلمان، و توقفت عن تخيل العفاريت و الجن الذي يطيرفوق صحارى بلاد الرمال و حروبهم مع جيوش المخلوقات الملائكيه التى تطرفش في السماء لتحرس الله و سقفه الازرق و تقاتل مع نبي الصحراء الكفار في غزواته ، و رفضت تصديق ان هناك شخصا بلعه الحوت و خرج سالما و اخر حمّل حديقة حيوانات ساندياغو على مركب خشبي و ثالث يحمل عصا سحريه يشق بها البحار و يرقص بها الثعابين..و انتبهت الي ما يفعلونه بعقلك من تلقين في المدارس و اجهزة الاعلام و الكتيبات اللامعه و الكاستيات و المساجد ورفضت فتاويهم التى تتحكم بتصرفاتك و سلوكك..فسترحم عقلك، و ستحمى ابنائك و احبابك من ان يتحولوا الي بهائم متفجره...صدقوني ..انهم يكذبون عليكم

بن كريشان

**
خلعت العلبه الشريره من الباب بصعوبه، لا ادرى اي نوع من الصمغ استخدمت امي، و خبطتها على الارض حتى انكسرت، ثم ناديت مارى و قلت لها يبدو ان هذا الشيء قد وقع، أحضرت المكنسه و قالت انها أخبرت أمي انها ستقع لو لم تثبتها بالبراغي

Person of the year

2005-12-31T13:59:00.000+03:00

Today is the last day of 2005. To follow its ups and downs, I formed a committee (consisting of myself) to select the Bahraini person of the year. Since the committee spent the budget throughout the year, and most of it went to book the URL, we don't have a prize this year... We just want the winner to know we whole-heartedly support what they're doing.. and what they did throughout the year didn't go unnoticed.

As for this year's winner, it was a close race... but the winner is none other than Ms. Ghada Jamsheer.

The main reason Ms. Jamsheer is the proud recipient of this award, is because she fought, and is still fighting, what others thought was a lost cause. Unlike the other so called liberals of "We have a right," which should change its name to "We have Money," Jamsheer did not side with the government blindly on every issue. She faught the religious figures that wanted to stop the personal status law AND the corrupt judges and officials.

Other so called liberals are just making a boogey man out of the religious extremists, in order for us to side with the big friendly government that will protect whats left of our rights.

Ghada can see through that.. after she won her battle against the deep pocketed judges, she faced their counterparts outside the courtroom that want to show their might against single women with children by calling upon more than 100,000 people.

To Ghada Jamsheer, from all of us in the "Joker's person of the year committee" we would like to thank you for what you have done.. and we would like to wish you all the best for 2006 and for the years to come.

Booming economy

2005-12-28T23:16:00.000+03:00

These are real people.. not dolphines at Sea World jumping in hoops to grab a fish in an aquarium. These people, in Saudi Arabia, are not protesting for a mulla held at the airport... and they are certainly not celebrating the countdown to the new year.

Beleive it or not... the man on top of the van is throwing out application forms so they can subscribe to a new Initial Public Offering.. to own shares in a company going public. Can you fucking beleive this? These are the sophisticated investors... these are the entrepreneurs that, with their organization, operational abilities, and risk appitite in venturing, will lead us to a prosperous tomorrow!

Now we know oil is selling in the east and in the west like hot cakes... but why are we doing exactly? Are we spreading the wealth from the top of a van like a UN relief mission in Somalia? First come, first chairman on the board? Do these people know the ABC's about proxies, commercial laws, capital financing, or even signing contracts?

Everyone is upset about what happened to the people that subscribed to the NASS shares that were underwritten last month, and once they were listed, they fell in value... basically throwing money in the toilet... you know what I think? Serves them right! If you are so fucking dumb that you can't tell a company that piles dirt and mixes cement was over-valued.. Dana gas had a par value of 100 fils.. which underwritter in their right mind valued a couple of shovels for over 600 fils? And the bigger question is.. how dumb could you be to actually become greed blinded and buy it?!

Its the basic law of evolution.. survival of the fittest... if you're too dumb to hold on to your savings.. the fast talker with the shady lawyer gets to walk away with them.

Now the burning question is why do we have half of the people under age 24 out in the streets boiling with rage because they can't find a job.. where others are cutting each others' throats trying to get "a piece of the pie", and become Wall Street bandits and day traders.. just an hour away from here? Oil prices are going up.. and the smoke in the Awali sky tells me we're in the oil business.. so why are many of us out of jobs? Is it because we're handing out IPO shares to idiots from the top of a van?

Identity Theft

2005-12-26T08:21:00.000+03:00

Last night as I was driving home, \"Girl you\'re my Angel\" was playing on the radio.. only it wasn\'t Shaggy and his feature singing it.. it was some country singer lady that probably wore 2 inch ear rings and high heel boots and sang about her ex husband that shot her dog at cowboy bars.

I don\'t know if you noticed this... but a couple of years ago country singers started remaking old black/soul music. White people.. you don\'t sing the blues.. you give black people the blues so they can sing about it! Can you imagine Tim Mcgraw singing Nat King Cole\'s \"unforgettable\"? Would anyone like it if Snoop Dogg sang Frank Sinatra\'s \"Thats Amore\"?

This identity theft is kind of funny. I read on one of the blogs about the 2005 bedouins.. long hair.. unshaved desert rat beard... and sipping a frappacino at starbucks. I donno about you, lawrence of bahrain-ia, don\'t you suppose a real bedouin drinks fresh goat milk in the morning? Young man.. its ok to go to private school and live in a Saar complex.. and I do see where you\'re coming from.. I see all the reasons why you have an inferiority complex that makes you want to turn into an Arabian Prince.

Because of the hierarchial society we live in, people have to conform to feel accepted. Some of us became very good at hiding their accents.. they seem to drop it somehow when they try to impress people with power and money.. and somehow it magically reappears when they meet up with their extended family members. Schizophrenia.

Be safe out there

2005-12-22T18:22:00.000+03:00

Lately, lots of metal has been colliding on the streets. All week I've heard different stories of people losing their lives on the main highways. As a matter of fact, a couple of hours ago I was told that 3 young men and a truck driver are no more because of what seems to be the latest in this string of accidents.

Now is not the time for the blame game... but I think I can propose a solution that might curb the frequency of fender benders going around town. First and foremost, we have to close the King Fahad Causeway at night. The traffic that comes here during the day is redicilus... I think its logical to start a cut-off period at around 11 pm. We can have a grace period during the weekdays maybe, but I think there is less necessity to go back to Saudi in the weekend at 3 in the morning right after happy hour. If you're coming here.. you're more than welcome.. stick to our rules. To those that might think that this might block some tourism dinars away, here is where you're wrong. We might end up making more. People will use the airport at night more often, especially the better off tourists, which means the airline industry might crawl out of the gutter... this also means the taxi's might get back in business... ask any taxi driver.. chances are he is not a very big fan of the King Fahad Causeway.. because they drive in their own cars.. And.. we will make money because the night cerfew forces people that drove in to stay the night here.. so they will probably have to crash in one of the fine hotels they probably spent the night in.. so thats hotel room revenue.. I'd say the pay-off evens out.. and the streets will be much safer because you'd have less drunks trying to cross the border at light speed so they can get home and take a piss!

Now.. the other proposal is to be more selective in giving driving permits. Not just any 18 year old gets to drive out of the traffic department on his birthday... I think.. if you fail a year in school.. that is one more year you put off.. you're not eligible for a license until you're 19.. and so on.. if you go to college early.. you get your license early as well to make it a fair deal. The point is.. if you spent more time studying and less time skidding and racing your car.. you'd pass school.. I wish they had an IQ test rather than an eyesight test over there.. if you fell in the lower quarter you disqualify... we want to thin out the weak genes behind the driving wheel.

Clash of Civilizations

2005-12-19T17:04:00.000+03:00

People with middle eastern traces over in Australia are getting attacked. Drunk white boys are upset that some brown people (habeebs) look like a couple of young men that either blew themselves up in airplanes, trains, and night clubs; or attempted to do so in places like Australia.

Now I am part of the generation that was taught that people are differet... so cultures are different... not that they're good or bad.. just different.

After the US was attacked, and launched a war on terror, they were trying to win some hearts and minds by saying its not a clash of civilizations.. we're just out to get extremists. Extremists are the small outlayers away from everyone...

Well.. in Cronulla beach 5000 punks showed up just because of an SMS message.. they turned out with australian flags.. racist chants... and written offensive slogans on their shirts:

"Many demonstrators wore clothing with slogans such as "Wog Free Zone", "Aussie Pride", "Fuck Allah - save Nulla" and "Ethnic Cleansing Unit". Chants of "Lebs out", "Lebs go home" and other expressions were continuously shouted by many of the demonstrators, including families with young children"

5000 is not a small number.. so this kind of makes me doubt the conclusion that there is no clash between civilizations... the bad people on both sides are given too much ends of the stick... The reason why I think civilizations are clashing is most humans come from families of between 3 and 6... Osama bin Ladin came from a family of 55 brothers and sisters... On friday nights most people in the world are watching football games... in Riyadh, Karachi, Kabul, and Tehran they watch "criminals" get beheaded.. gives a new meaning to the word culture shock there...

I didnt have time to read the whole story.. but today there was a headline that the Saudi government is asking women to be realistic in their demands... sounds to me like they're saying car keys are a far-fetched dream...

All these australians marching down the coast kicking the shit out of "lebs"; and on the other hand, the Saudi's not standing for women driving a car, carrying proper identification documents, and TGIF fridays are handless theives and head-less fornicators really looks like a clash of civilizations to me.

No more music

2005-12-16T19:56:00.000+03:00

Dr. Abdul Ghaffar, thank you from the bottom of my heart for banning that sour note of a musician Hakeem from performing in Teatro restaurant. You saved us from his foul voice and cheesy act. I was just wondering.. when will you get some balls and kick Michael Jackson out of Bahrain too? Or is it because a royal invited him?

Let me get this straight. Hakeem is public enemy, but Michael Jackson gets a house in a prime location? Not only that, I also heard he gets to open a boys school.

Congradulations on National day. As a concerned citizen, I feel I have to report that I was watching your television station this afternoon, and I saw some people SINGING about national day... can you beleive this? Not only that.. they were dancing.. right in the middle of the day.. and the mother of all horrers.. there were GIRLS TOO!

This has gone too far. Please roll up your sleeve and silence those sinners that sing about "how we have a great democracy" and how we "live in a country that allows everyone to express themselves." Its true.. dont get me wrong.. you're allowed to express yourself.. but not with music apparently..

By the way, doctor... have you heard the latest joke going around town? If you're unemployed hide any papers that show it.. or you might go to jail!

Apple Cider again ?!

2005-12-13T17:26:00.000+03:00

I knew apple cider was good for nothing since day 1! It says right here that the Jordanian students over at Apple Cider (the mother university) started a rumble with the GCC students over there.. picking up fights and what have you.. because the said minority won in the student elections over there. Apparently an Omani that was inaugurated with a pipe on his head, and other kuwaiti newly elected reps incited anger about Saddam and GCC nationals having more money. The Islamic movement (who else) accused the kuwaiti students of bribing voters to win, and apparently went on to start their jihad on them.

First of all, these people will never understand democracy. When will they understand peaceful succession of power? I mean who am I to blame them.. whats their role model in the greater middle east? Syria?

Second, if our students are -ALLEGEDLY- rich enough to bribe their way to office, why the fuck do they have to go to a second tier school in Jordan to get an education? Can't their governments afford a decent school here? I mean Kuwaitis apparently don't send warm fuzzies down Jordanian students' spines... why are they taking the frequent beatings from time to time? The quality of education there? Rather than send them by bulk to bribe their collegues, just build them a decent school here and hire good professors and buy quality books.

Cake or Death?

2005-12-11T17:27:00.000+03:00

On my daily blog route, I saw a comment that basically said its a shame that blogger was a so-called-muslim. On another blog, I read a comment that basically called a very good friend not a loyal citizen and a couple of other racial remarks. (I at least hope it was the same person and not two separate people leaving those comments.)

My favorite comedian, Eddie Izzard, had a bit about the spanish inquisition in his stand up show "Dress to Kill." He explained that part of history as a red army that marched all over Europe chanting "Cake or Death! Cake or Death!" Meaning, if you chose to subscribe to their orthodoxy of Catholicism, you got cake.. if not.. they chop of your head. Not left with much choices there I guess.. and I wonder what happened to the people after they ran out of cake?

It kept me thinking.. Saddam Hussain, and many of his likes, stayed in power basically making it clear that if you disagree with me.. you are not loyal... and if I ever doubt your allegance.. I will kill you! In fact, you will have to work VERY HARD to stay alive.. because you have to customize yourself their interpretations or parameters, or they will strike with vengence.

What a rational person would consider independent thinking, they consider unloyal.

Tree doing the Ruku

2005-12-08T18:51:00.000+03:00

Someone with lots of time on his hand figured out that a tree "somewhere in an australian forrest" looks like a man bending over, like a muslim prayer "Ruku." A bunch of people with MORE time on their hands actually flew down there to take a picture with a banner, and probably went to set up a souvenir shop next to it.

Islam's first confrontation was with the polytheistic arabs and non-arabs in Mecca that worshiped all kinds of stuff... just like that tree. In fact, the only way those pagan religions started at some point in time is probably because someone found a profoundly insignificant event or coincidence (like a bird that shit on his head for example) and ran back to his village screaming his lungs out because he thought he had a revelation.

There is an old story in Bahrain's history. I don't know it too well, because our history books at school are worth a bucket of hot spit, so its not very accurate... but it goes something like this:

Hundreds.. or maybe a thousand years ago.. the ruler of Bahrain, and the people back then were religious and kind of zelous... so one of the ministers.. or noblemen wanted to capitalize on their simple approach to religion... so he crafted a mold with scripts and holy writings... and placed it on a little orange or a fig (not too sure) growing on the tree in Ras Rumman. A couple of weeks later, when that fruit grew into proportion.. it had holy script on it... The ruler thought that God communicated to this gentleman through fruits... you can guess who was ordering stuff around after that.. thats until they found out that he was molding fruits to get them to read what he wanted...

Moral of the story is... don't make a big deal out of stupid stuff...

Note: My friend Profoundity Ferret has his own blog now. Please give it a look at jaffar-alomran.blogspot.com

Free my parking spot

2005-12-05T22:15:00.000+03:00

This evening I was running late for my night class at BIBF. For a good 5 minutes I could not find a parking spot. Apparently, a new college is in business right in front of the institute. At the same time, there was a big basketball game in the dome near by, Manama was playing Ahli. It was a parking crisis.

This new college is called Applied science university I guess. For ease of reference, lets call it apple cider. Apple Cider pupils, let me tell you something your parents didnt tell you, just so they don't hurt your feelings. I'm about to tell you, to soften your hit with reality's cold brick wall. You are dumb. A degree from Apple Cider only makes you look like retards that drool in a cup. If you can't compete in a decent university, can't you at least see through the hoax of issuing you a worthless peice of paper that will not take you very far away from your day jobs?

Good students of Apple Cider... please realize that I need that parking space more than you do to go learn that 3 is a bigger number than 2. Please free my parking spot and realize that you need to pick up your shit at some point in life and not take the easy way out. I am sure it will work out for you somewhere else.

Head in the sand

2005-12-03T02:55:00.000+03:00

This past week and a half has been sort of eventful. We've had an honorable MP asking god to "show him a black day over the majority of the population", a young man accousing undercover police forces of unspeakable crimes, and civil unrest in old Mrs. Manama and new miss Seef.

Now doesnt this look like a slip up from the begining of the month when the Liberals tried to organize a movement "we have the right" and the Women's council was fencing with Isa Qassim and his followers about the personal status law, in a very civilized manner? Why did things go south all of a sudden?

Now that all that tear gas has settled, maybe its time to notice that lately when there was a flicker of constructive dialogue in our local politics (Wefaq remobilizing into the parliment, women rights activists and opposition lobbying for a law, businessmen with new ideas voted into the Chamber of commerce, liberals making a stand) someone must have pulled the rug.

The government as of yet has its head in the sand, waiting for this wave to pass. The high authorities in the land dismissed the whole parliment in 1975 not to be seen until the next millenium... I kindly ask you to dismiss one member now. We know its not the formal procedure.. but we feel that what he said qualifies as a misconduct that should not keep him in a decision making function, and certainly a breach of human rights. Thats the first thing I'd like to see. The second is, investigate the accusation of the midnight raiders. Be clear about getting to the bottom of this... Do us all a favor and put these issues to rest...

Empty hands

2005-11-30T22:37:00.000+03:00

Bonsai-Mark once told me about a saying they have over in New England. They say "idle hands are the devil's workshop." Very true indeed. The fiercest riots and demonstrations we've had lately are in one form or another related to the unemployed. Now why wouldn't you find someone like me burning a trash bin or throwing rocks at policemen with big guns? Because I kinda have to show up at work tomorrow morning... and I better be shaved. On the other hand, someone my age or younger.. with no job or education to attend to... doesnt really need to give a flying fuck about most of anything... In fact.. he's already pissed.. so someone yelling over his head and charging him ahead definetely has his ear. If we're too dis-organized of a community and a government to sell oil and hire 30% of our labor from abroad but have 20% unemployment.. this is a serious problem that certainly will get some people mad. If we can't find them jobs, can't we at least put them to use? I've seen community programs in the United States organize all-nighter programs. They have a basket ball tournament ( 3 on 3) all night long in urban minority neighborhoods, to keep deprived young men off of drugs. Can't we at least take a big portion of these people to fish during day time or make wooden crafts to sell to tourists? Sounds stupid and simple.. but it beats taking the country back to the infamous mid 90's.

Please do not think that you are above or better than any of these people out there tonight. You were just lucky enough to get nurtured and set up for a more fullfilling life, and something to do all day long.

Parochialism

2005-11-29T19:12:00.000+03:00

*Mailed in by profoundity ferret

History of dissention between people and the government has taken several shapes ranging from the severe repression to cold feet attempts of reform. The common factor between the two eras is that they all took shape from people’s pursuit of their interests.

Scrutinizing those interests, some observers arguably concluded that whatever people consider and identify, as being their interest and act accordingly toward them must be regarded as such and an attempt to postulate that people are pursuing objectives and interest that might turn out to be contrary to their ultimate goals is improper.

Well, the above postulate has based its conclusion on unreasonable idealistic view of what impels people, build their belief and consciousness and form their values and principles. People consciousness of all matters are formed and shaped immensely by external powers and how flexible and exposed are people toward them. So people tend to zealously defend their interest when they see that some powers are exposed to jeopardy (religion) or when some become so rigorous (poverty and unevenness).

People might, however, erroneously define and prioritize their interests, which jeopardize other interests and their existence. For instance, people in Bahrain are so fervent to political involvements through endless demonstrations and forums in respect to the domestic issues and show full support and passion to the external events such as Iraq and Palestine, and they put their wrath on hold, or in rapt silence for economical matters (except for unemployment issues of course, and they deal with it from political perspective rather than economical). Did any one of us witness demonstration asking for justifications and explanation to grim report on Bahrain’s competitiveness issued by BNCC? Did any of the cleric, scholars and “elites” mount the platform or through web forums and gave speech on environment issues, health issues, Recent Audit Bureau Report, Labor market, reform of labor market, increasing unemployment, school drops, birth restriction, educational requirements for labor market, educational standards (especially university of Bahrain standards), charity funds, need I go on? No words mouthed due to both misinformation and disinformation.

To disavow misinformation and disinformation is to disavow indoctrination and manufacturing the consent among various classes in the society. People stance is product of social, political and religious controls and people’s goals and actions to achieve goals would be considered legitimate if they are free to choose and decide.

Do you think that parochialism does exist in our society?

Arab world.. Persian gulf

2005-11-27T15:25:00.000+03:00

lately, I've read an article calling for arabs not to refer to these great plains as the Middle East, but stress on calling it the Arab World. The article is uncovering a massive conspiracy from the west (where else) to inject a foreign object "Israel" into pure Arabia. It said that the west is attempting to ease the integration of Israel into the region by referring to us and them in a mutually inclusive region. Thank you sir for bringing to my attention this cunning masterplan. Can you beleive what would be the outcome if I succumbed to that lethal play on words? While we're at it, one must note that the term cross-check is also a deceitful term that might turn into checking each other to see if we were wearing a holy cross or not, and Toyota and Motorola are old hebrew insults to our mothers, just like pokemon, that promotes zionism and gambling.

Iranians are funding a big movement to prevent the name "Arabian Gulf" and spread the name "Persian Gulf" after a stupid dispute. The activists sent threat letters to National Geographic for publishing that name on their map, boycotted the publication, even started selling wrist bands to finance this worthy cause, just like the yellow "live strong's." They try to explain this stupidity as "preserving the persian empire." Well... you could try to preserve the empire by not voting a nut-job into office, that wants Israel wiped out but swears on his mother's soul that he doesnt attempt getting a nuclear bomb.... You can also try spending money on school books and computers rather than bombs and tanks.... You know what else I bet would preserve the persian empire? I bet letting journalists and bloggers out of jail to speak their mind sure would help too.

Now back to the idiot that wants to draw the line between the arab world and the middle east.. You can dress a pig in a tuxedo, but its still a pig. No matter what you call it... If I, for example, call the area I live in Jokerland... does it change the reality of where I live? Not one bit... You know what would? If I planted more trees and less land mines... It sure would make it a more pleasant place to stay in.

HTTP 403 (Forbidden)

2005-11-24T16:28:00.000+03:00

For a month now, when I try to long onto my favorite website in arabic, I get this message in bold : "You are not authorized to view this page." I need some information. Can you help me get the latest posts in that website Minister, Doctor, Preacher A. Ghaffar?

There was an old book.. came out in the first half of last century called 1984.. the whole idea was a dysfunctional authoritarian system could only function when everything was completely the opposite. The main character, Winston Smith, worked for the ministry of truth* which was responsible for spreading lies and manipulating the public in a fictional country called oceania... sounds painfully familiar to me! If George Orwell, the Author, heard about what we have here (MOI)... he would pull back the books from the shelves.. republish them again.. and called it the ministry of information, for ease of reference.

At times when you CLAIM that your heart is broken in half that the religious fanatics are taking over the country, and that its bad for business, and they're chasing all the investments away.. and yada yada yada... why do you close down the most liberal website in arabic in the world wide web? Is that terribly wise to counter and absorb the fundamentalism brewing in the street?

Do you really need someone to dumb it down for you and explain that when you take channels and outlets away, and stop people from expressing themselves, they get upset? And when they get upset and can't express themselves, they get more upset! And when they get really upset, and the only thing they get to listen to,(after you shot down and shut up every other opinion) asks them to go on a killing rampage, because god wants it that way, THEY WILL FUCKING DO IT!

Is that what you want? You want the people to get frustrated? Well congradulations! You did a wonderful job!

* I highly recommend you to read/ or read about the Novel 1984. " The novel was written by George Orwell under the title of The Last Man in Europe. However, the book's publishers in both the United Kingdom and the United States, where it was simultaneously released, moved to change its title for marketing purposes to Nineteen Eighty-Four. First published on June 8, 1949, The book begins approximately on April 4th, 1984 (the first entry in Winston Smith's diary) at 13:00 ("It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen...")."

George Orwell is the best political satarical writer in the world. His most famous book was Animal Farm.

Window dressing

2005-11-22T17:30:00.000+03:00

It says right here, "To underscore the friendship, the Saudi foreign minister presented Rice with a chocolate birthday cake inscribed to her and with the flags of both nations. The Saudi delegation then sang "Happy Birthday" to her, U.S. officials said. Rice turns 51 on Monday."

Excuse me... I think I need to get my geography straight. Isn't this the same country that doesn't celebrate Prophet Mohammed's birthday? Here they are sharing cake with an infedel, thats also a WOMAN, and singing happy birthday? Whats wrong with my compass?

If celebrations, birthdays, valentines, and new year's eve go against pure Islamic teachings, then why do these politicians tend to forget them when Ms. Rice is in town? If they're more like loose guidelines left for personal interpretation, then why are they being enforced on us?

If you're going to enforce your demented views of religion, and shove your own convictions down my throat, I guess I'm out of luck...thats my problem.. but why didn't you stay consistent when Ms. Rice showed up at your doorstep? Why did you run to the window and paint it with peaches and cream? You should've made her wear a decent Hijab, bring a male relative or (perferrably) a husband to the meeting, and dismissed the satanic cult called "birthday", like everyone else! Why did you cater to her enjoyment and personal satisfaction, when I can't go to a Mall in Saudi with male friends any day of the week? By the way, there was an MP that even asked that Seef Mall had a weekly "Ladies only" day too!

The reason I raise these questions is this little party clearly goes against the Fatwa about buying flowers. I quote “It is not the habit of Muslims to offer flowers to the sick in hospital. This is a custom imported from the land of the infidels by those whose faith is weak. Therefore it is not permitted to deal with flowers in this way, neither to sell, to buy nor to offer them as gifts,” the fatwa said.

Selective Justice

2005-11-20T22:11:00.000+03:00

A week or more ago, I was late for work.. so in order to cut time, I drove into the yellow lane on the side of the flyover in Manama, next to the Pearl roundabout. Soon enough, police lights were beaming, and I started singing "Bad boys bad boys.. watchu gonna do.. watchu gonna do when we come for you!" in my head. The Police officer walked that condisending walk we all know, put his hands around his wrist, and smirked that old "what do you think you're doing this morning, son!" He started looking for other offences he can come up with to nail me... that car badge looks old to me.. did you renew your car registration? Why yes I did, sir... can I just leave now?

Like a good citizen, I took my traffic ticket and promised not to do it again. I said to myself I fucked up.. I have to face the consequences like an adult and drove off....

This afternoon... I was walking around the old souq, I saw a police officer ticketing the cars in the off-limits space.. just walking around and signing his autograph one after the other... he got to a fancy Benz, and as sure as the day is long, I saw that little fuck swiftly glide around that car and ticket the ones behind it! Now that didn't send warm fuzzies over my body... I could swear it was the same jack ass from a week ago... if it wasn't him I'm sure he would've done the same thing.. from that condisending attitude..

Harsh laws are nice... apply them on everybody so they become laws... sticking it to the poor is just bullying them around and nothing else!

Preparing to fail

2005-11-16T23:00:00.000+03:00

I got home after I watched Bahrain's best and finest footballers grass-roll and fake injury thier way out of some get-together footballers have every four years. I am writing and behind me on TV switzerland and Turkey are fighting with every tissue of muscle to knock each other out. Switzerland came in with a 2 nil lead. They got in and scored another... but did the Turks hang their boots already? They were mentally prepared to get back in there... and surprise surprise they tied 3 - 3 at the hour mark! It doesn't matter if they do qualify or not... at least they gave this day what it deserved.

How about we compare that to us? Basically, fans, players, politicians, and everyone were divided in two halves. The first half was so sure we were going to qualify and prepared for the celebrations days before the game (and I was part of that), and the other half was preparing to lose. They voiced subdeud low self esteem before the game, and sure enough, our boys put on red shirts and rear-guarded their penalty box like a 2 foot wall in front of a 9 foot tsunami!

Now, to the people that are supposed to manage the team. Did you ever entertain the posibility of T&T scoring one goal throughout your trip from the carribian to the gulf? Certainly a possibility when their forward got a golden boot award after he won the champions league in 1999! Its not fair to get off on them hard from my side, because we were all along until we got here.. its just a shame we got this close.

Now let me change this sour subject into something else I wanted to blog about when I was wondering which in-road to take to watch the "after-qualification-celebrations." Before the game started, I could swear I saw advertisements on the sports channel for 2 new newspapers and 4 different colleges. In a decent society, colleges and newspapers are the most intellectual institutions harboring the elite, and producing mind and management. Introducing a publication is fine, but whats up with these double door universities? Do they actually certify doctors and bankers and lawyers? Do they fail weak students? I mean you ran an ad on TV and I signed up for class.. the customer is always right..so if I answered Shakespear died in World War 2, by God he died in WW2! Now print out my certificate!

Does anyone see the implications of allowing these classrooms-on-wheels taking in University of Bahrain rejects and telling them "its ok to cry.." ? I guess this gets back to my original point.. we are not preparing the coming generations to take on the world. We are cutting corners, blinded by the all mighty dinar. Rather than license the dozen universities we have, why don't we do it right the first time? Pool in all those resources, fund a proper research programs in all kinds of discipline, and cough up a proper budget to bring in top school professors, and a little shed of self-respect of admitting the competent rather than the wealthy? I would hate to get gray and old, rolled into an operation room, and the doctor's certificate looks like it was faxed to him!

PS: Turkey just lost the tie.

Transparency Bridges

2005-11-14T16:24:00.000+03:00

Our favorite reporter in the world, Tariq Khonji, covered an attempt to propose a commission that watches over tenders and government transactions, to make sure no side agreements or funneling is going on anymore, after the local media published the transparency report. Apparently the government was approving castles in the sky, or as I like to call them Chinese city lights.

That report made our human rights record blush. Good job government. Just when we think we can't do any worse, somehow you rise to the occassion.

This reminds me of an old joke. A Bahraini minister went on a friendly visit to Italy. The italian minister took him around the city and then to his mansion. So the Bahraini minister asks "how can you afford a mansion when everyone else lives in apartments?" So the Italian minister says "Go to that window and move the curtain. See that bridge over there?" Bahraini minister says "yes, its beautiful." Italian minister says "The budget was set for 3 million and I built it with 2. Now you know how I can afford this mansion."

A year later the Italian minister comes down here. Sure enough, the Bahraini minister takes him around, and then back to his Palace in Saar or wherever. The Italian minister now asks "If you don't mind me asking, how can you afford this big palace and everyone else here is living in shacks?" So the Bahraini minister says " Go to that window and move the curtain. Do you see a bridge there?" "No" he replies. Bahraini minister yells "EXACTLY!"

Polygyny

2005-11-12T22:29:00.000+03:00

* Profoundity Ferret is back again where the discussion ended last time.

Why Islam Permits Polygyny

Let us take this example. Man and woman are married, the woman after some quite long time is discovered to be barren and the husband needs a kid so badly (that is his natural right I guess), so the only viable solution is to have kids from another sexual relationship, either adultery or legal marriage. Legal marriage to a second wife in non-Islamic societies is not possible; a man has to divorce the first (barren) woman in order to marry the second, a case in which this barren woman will be left a lone and the possibility of her to get into legal relationship is rather low. While in Muslim societies a man need not to divorce the first woman in order to get into another legal sexual relationship, a case in which the first woman can still be married to him and eligible to all her rights.

By the same talking, what would be a case of a woman is turned out to be permanently ill and that illness prevents her from satisfying her husband needs ( as part of her natural duties to him as partner, nothing more nothing less), which one is fairer to her, divorcing her keeping her married to him and enjoy his full support and security?

We Willy-nilly know that gender ratio in almost all societies to be around 3 women more per man, thus, the question that remains how could this excess ratio, get husband, security and fulfillment? Let us keep an answer to this question for open discussion.

Reality VS theory

Before any of the readers who disagree on the issue of Polygyny starts hitting their keyboards furiously , let me say this: I know that all of the benefit above besides others are just in theory for us Muslim to brag about how great and universal our religion while in practice, it is totally grim situation. Polygyny is more attached to

Some rich people who think that with the adequacy of his wealth he can financially support more than one house.
Villagers, need I explain why?
Turbaned and scholars: what surprise me is that the majority of turbaned I know of in our society has more than one wife, knowing that fact that he is not even financially secured as the majority of his financial resources come from mounting the platforms in religious occasions. Such people who make speech to their congregations about politics, Islamic laws, inciting them to demonstrate for their rights, etc. how much time do they spend with their wives and kids every day if he has two- three families? How much time can he allocate to take care of his two –three families, read, search, study, prepare to mount the platform, etc.? How can he stand to their needs?

Conclusion:

While it is permitted in the religion and I can neither defend nor justify it because it is God permission, I ask to restrict Polygyny through the judicial system as it's attached with problems and harmful consequences on the societies by irresponsible applications.
I hope government legislates a law soon, which restricts number of children per family. Why? Because situations of ALL villages are catastrophic and the consequences are far from explanation, villagers do not want to understand that they complain all the time that their salaries are not enough for their survival and yet they produces kids every other year. !

Empiror's New York

2005-11-10T01:33:00.000+03:00

In the 1930's, a Chinese Empiror went to New York City for a visit. He was taken to the top of the Empire State Building (ironic,) and he was very much bewildered with the sight of little lights all over the city. He decided he wanted his city in China to look the same.

As soon as he got back to the orient, he called for the Prime Minister, and gave him one million yuans to finance the street lamps project. The Prime Minister gathered the Ministers and informed them that the Empiror has set aside the grand total of half a million yuans, and gave them his blessings. The ministers called on the municipal representatives and passed along the 100,000 yuans to go ahead with the project. That week, the municipal representatives beat their drums and declared "Good people of this city, the Empiror has ordered each and every one of you to hang an oil lamp on your houses."

That night, the Empiror stood at his balcony, and was very happy to see his city glowing with little lights like New York.

Winds of Change

2005-11-09T23:11:00.000+03:00

This is not a scene from the twilight zone. This is the honest-to-god truth. Tomorrow at 5 pm, I will hop on an airplane to go to a Scorpion's concert, in Doha, Qatar. While I'm chanting "Rock you like a Hurricane" and "Send me an Angel" with the german rock legends, guess who's in Bahrain? Who's old and sad enough to remember The Human League? I can't believe this!
How did this happen? The highlight of the weekend is an 80's one-hit-wonder that disappeared into the backshelves of a record store?

Does anyone other than myself see a problem with going from BAHRAIN to QATAR to get your groove on? All do respect to our pleasant neighbor, but weren't we the ones priding ourselves for being hip? This is wrong... this is wrong...

Family Law

2005-11-07T14:16:00.000+03:00

* These are Profoundity Ferret's thoughts and opinions about the family law. I disagree with alot of what he is saying, but the issue is well thought-out.

What is Family law?

It is a group of law stipulates handling of marriage, divorce, children custody, inheritance, alimony, and etc. cases. These laws jump to the surface recently due to several factors among which:

· Increased awareness among women in particular of their capability to change their current unjust treatment of their (women) cases with regard to divorces, marriages, alimony and guardianship through some communities and societies which started to take shape recently,

· Continued family violence and ignominy especially against women,

· Lack of last resort to most of the women in family disputes due to the masculinity of our society that women should always be a follower to the man since he has the last word in marriage, divorce and guardianship.

· Corruption in the court system that any of the abovementioned cases might take very long time to be resolved during which most of the women has to continue suffering with their collapsed marriages, or thrown on the street waiting for some charities to provide them with their basic needs

All of the abovementioned reasons plus more lead women to raise their voices asking for laws to protect their status disregarding who legislates that, religion or the government, they had enough of humiliation and disrespect.

Now I answered briefly " what is the need to legislate family law?" question. But let us underline proponents' statement:" legislate law". Do our court systems lack laws that govern the above cases so that proponents are recommending to come-up with new ones? The answer is no, the official religion of the kingdom is Islam and it explicitly stated in the constitution that Islamic sources of laws in respect to the above matters are the holy book and the prophet hadiths.

But if the Islamic laws that protect the women's rights and their social status are there, why family cases have to wait for ages to be resolved?

The problem is not with the absence of laws, rather, it is with the judicial systems and the application of laws among people. One proof to the last point is: are we suffering from lack of legislated commercial and banking laws? Resounding NO, then why do we have conflicts, violations, and legal suits against employers, banks, companies in addition to the fact that some of those cases wait for years to be resolved. So the problem is not ascribed to the absence of laws, it is with the judicial system and the applications of laws among people involved.

Why most of the turbaned and ayatollahs opposing this law? i.e. what is their take on the subject? The turbaned concerns are on delegating the parliament or any government's agencies to legislate the family law. Their argument is that laws pertaining to marriage, divorce, alimony, etc. should governed by Islamic laws not by codified law legislated by people who lack expertise in Islamic laws and principles such as seculars, communist and socialist (there are actually some communists among the proponent of the law). But you turbaned what are you going to say if we tell you that we would give you positive assertions that the law would be in line with the Shari'a Directives? Ayatollahs have taken one step further to reply that even if we are given assertions that law will be in line, who guarantee that it will remain so given the fact that the law has taken its legitimacy through the parliament, and what is approved by the current parliament might be rejected in the next one. So turbaned wants constitutional guarantee that family law once legislated by Islamic expertise should be given a constitutional guarantee to keep those laws unchanged

Let me now tackle the turbaned argument, you want Islamic law to proceed any other laws. Ok, are we going to have unified law for both Sunni and Shia or two separate law for each? If your reply is unified, then how long do we have to wait until you reach on an agreement and compromise to your everlasting differences? And if your reply is separate law then are you ready to the sub difference among shia themselves and sunni themselves because as you know there are significant variations in fatwas (religious opinion) between one ayatollahs to the other and between Wahabi and Sunni? Both parties are silent to these crucial questions.

I do no think that scholars who are so into opposition sexually insecure or they are against women rights, instead, it is quite evident from their speeches and books that they are totally with women rights and equality. Then why they are so freaked-out because of the law? They are freaked out because of similar proposition in other countries for family law that disregarded and violated fundamental Islamic principles, which totally not accepted by all Muslim people (I suppose). For instance, in Tunisia, the current family laws contains sheer variation from the Islamic laws as follows:

· Forbids polygamy, which is explicitly allowed in the holy book
· Women can divorce men
· Equality of women to men in inheritance
· Allowed abortions

In sum, I would like to make the following conclusions on my take on the issue:

Islamic laws should supercedes other laws.
Any community and committee that is involved in legislating any laws to govern social status and any other issues directly related to religion should be formed with Islamic expertise, not seculars or people of any doctrines.
There is no lack of Islamic laws that stipulates the social status, every thing is there in the religion, rather, we lack judicial system and proper &conscientious applications of the laws.
Turbaned should not take the issue to the streets through demonstrations; the issue should be discussed through civilized ways.
scholars should stress on the reform of judicial system as much as they do in opposing the law because most of the corruptions In the judicial system is because of turbaned as well.
Seculars and other proponents of the law should stop accusing the scholars of any wrongdoing, they have their rational concerns.

I Hate F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

2005-11-06T02:55:00.000+03:00

I hate this show! I can't stand this feminist agenda that ruled the broadcast for more than a decade. The reasons why I hate this show is:

6 people living in New York, and all of them are white caucasian. Not a single black or puerto rican? In NYC?!? I think thats racist.
Whats funny about a couple of dumb guys that aren't comfortable with their masculinity? And why are men portraid as dumb? I bet not many people noticed that sitcoms lately show men as dumb slow-thinkers that can't take care of themselves (Raymond, the men in Friends, Homer Simpson..etc.)
3 gorgious, very thin women. Most people don't look like that. I think it pressures young ladies in that pre-teen part of their lives and puts wrong ideas in their heads about how they should look like.
A friend of mine pronounced something in a funny way, and I kindly reiterated it correctly. She's like "Thank you, ROSS!"
We get it. Sex Sells. But the sexual tension in that show is way over exploited! Everyone is trying to screw everybody else. 6 horney people.. ha ha very funny.

Who's idea was this?

2005-11-03T14:28:00.000+03:00

The latest law in the land is all the 5 star hotels have to be closed for the Eid holiday. Why is that? another Arab leader died this week? Or are they being inspected for weapons of mass destruction? This is some serious bullshit!

I've had it with these beards and turbans going talibani on our ass! You know, now that you did a good job chasing tourism out of this country, there is another similar sounding word you have to think about, Terrorism! Now that we are going ahead in banning 5 star functions and restaurants, whats next? Shopping malls for families only? Have big signs on entrances saying "NO BACHELORS!" like the one I've seen years ago in Alrashid Mall?

Now tourism and terrorism kind of sound the same. With no tourism, first there is no outlet to relax and enjoy some simple pleasures of life. Second, tourism is the fastest growing service sector in the world for a while now. Finally, and I believe this point is overlooked, tourism gives us the exposure to other people and cultures. The more you do see that, the more you respect our differences and appreciate the meaning of being humans.

Now, after this thunderbolt of a decision, we will have a young generation that 1. Do not have much of a choice to enjoy themselves 2. Don't have a job 3. Don't appreciate people that are different.

You can guess where this new path we're taking is going to lead us!

Justice

2005-11-02T15:52:00.000+03:00

This piece was mailed in by my friend, yippy yo yippy yay, which will be known from now and evermore as "profoundity ferret."

Recently I have been going through Omar Shareef biography and I stopped at his answer to a question " do you believe in God", " I believe in every thing and nothing!, since I born, I was told that believing in God is believing in justice, and I did not and will not see justice in this world", he replied.

I am not intending to conclude anything from his statement about his belief, rather, what I would like to stress upon in his statement is the word justice. I can see his point pretty well. Where can we find this justice in here? Your boss is such an airhead, with no proper education and personality, not mentioning his sick attitude while you holding your qualifications and educations, striving to develop and improve, and he is your boss.

Where is that justice, if you apply for a job, with everything it takes to assume that position, and you see that your chances is voided, some one knows someone in the same place and he/she let him in.

Does justice mean one gets what he deserves, or is rewarded as much as he puts?
Where is that justice, any one?

www.thejoker.cc

2005-11-02T15:49:00.000+03:00

From now on, you can enjoy this free website at this domain name www.thejoker.cc
Emoodz was kind enough to rent me space on the web.

Eid, anyone?

2005-10-29T16:48:00.000+03:00

Eid is around the corner. Does it look like it? I'm afraid it doesn't. Are the people in the entertainment business not hungry for our dinars anymore? What are we going to have this year? A couple of lousy plays from the same folks that brought us the ramadan TV series, and thats about it? I remember a number of years ago, every eid holiday, we had a number of the top singers come in here for live concerts. Not that I'm a big fan of their music, but Ahlam, Kathim Al Sahir, Nanci Ajram, and others really got in traffic from all over the GCC; which meant overnight stays, restaurants and cafes, even petrol stations saw more business.

Lately though, we're keeping a very low profile, like having fun is a sin. Some people are of the opinion that this is a government conspiracy, to prove that freedom of expression is bad, because it shys off business and leasure, to return to a more authoritarian regiem. That shit ain't the truth. The truth is, we have young men getting brainwashed by wahhabis and their nemisises with turbans, to run out and ruin whats un-holy.

I was out of the country when this happened. I was told there was a very nice, relaxed and groovy lounge near Burhama or Sanabis. Now its a lebanonise restaurant. It got raided by a school of angry teenagers that were pretty upset liquer was sold near their village. One of the lads was carrying a knife on him, and apparently one of the patrons stabbed him on the side of his stomach. I wonder, what was going on through his mother's head that night? And you know what else I wonder about? Who gained out of all this? The restaurant owner went out of business and had to put the place up for sale; the patron that made the stab, apparently reacted under alcohol influence, which means he is in really big trouble, and the poor kid is in critical condition. Was it the mulla that called the charge? Really not sure. But I certainly do know who's losing out of all this. All of us!

Economics of Sports

2005-10-26T15:45:00.000+03:00

http://buzz.yahoo.com/

First Topic:

Apparently "Bahrain" was the 4th most searched buzz word on October 25, 2005, with an increase of 1769% ! Why? Did they find a case of bird flu, or did the Mehlis report link Hariri's murder to wifaq? Actually, its because we're playing TnT (Trinidad and Tobago) in a couple of weeks, and everyone is excited to see two first time hopefuls try to battle out a ticket to the world cup finals like gladiators.

Now, another topic:

We don't have Gallup polls or things of that sort in Bahrain. I wonder, how do people in power assess public opinion? I hope they don't still depend on "he said, she said" indicators? Sometimes I wonder, does the Crown Prince visit Bahraini blogs, just to see "whats the word on the street"? I hope he does; because unlike the newspapers, we give out our opinions straight and deep. If he does read Bahraini blogs, I want to voice my contribution to the economic development of the Kingdom, since that seems to be under his wing.

Now, the two topics merge:

Shaikh Salman, I think you should direct the EDB and other government bodies dedicated to attract investments and facilities to Bahrain (Financial, Telecommunications, Industry, services) to focus on developing sports...the athletic infrastructure is clearly lacking; its amazing how we're this good with these limited facilities.

Sir, our game next november gave Bahrain so much name recognition. Even the cancelled game with Uzbekistan got us publicity more than money can buy. I sat in a table with people from Africa and Europe that I didnt expect would have the slightest idea where Bahrain is. To my surprise, they were divided in the controversial issue of whether repeating the game was right, or whether the penalty kick was valid.

If we spend half a decent budget on preparing competitive teams that book seats in major athletic events, we can be the center of lots of attention. When the National Team played the asian cup finals, we held China to a tie on their field, and were breathing down Japan's neck in an unforgettable thriller, fans in that part of the world became very interested in ours. Needless to say, lots of economic value comes from Japan, and more than ever, from China.

Let me put it this way. If we advance to a secondary stage in world cup, we have two full hours of air time broadcasted across the globe. More than a third of the world's population watch the final game in WC. If we get close to it, it can get us alot of investment dollars coming here.

Religion = Income?

2005-10-25T00:40:00.000+03:00

Today, after a heavy iftar meal, I kicked back in front of the tube with my father watching the valuable variety of intellectual programming when I recieved a message. It was the good folks from MTC-vodafone, not reminding me of a bill payment, but offering me a daily prayer (du'aa) in the voice of shaikh bin ufaisan or something, 30 days for BD3. What a bargain! Sounds like those sex lines 1800 h-o-t-g-i-r-l ads they have on TV. My father made a comment about using religion to make a buck.. I tried to argue with him, not because I disagree, but its the laziest way of seeing whats on his mind.. we got up to do different things.. but I kept thinking... When you get married you pay an arm and a leg in dowry, because it says right there that you must make some form of payment to the bride's folks, cheap-ass!

When I lived in an isolated town in west Texas, in ramadan this mulla suspected that the food we had for Iftar wasn't exactly Halal, so he picks up the big dish of "god's gift to nurish our bodies" and threw it in the garbage can in the street. He claimed that he didnt want to be responsible for us eating un-halal food. Fair enough. Apparently this guy found an arbitrage, and did his business buying halal meat from out of town and selling it for twice the going rate. Is he still responsible if I couldnt afford his offering and got allured by the devil beef?

The most obvious example is Islamic banking. Basically, interest is the devil's accountant. We'll have none of that! What we'll do is, I'll make a run to the car dealership, buy the car FOR YOU, and you pay me the difference... uhh well isn't that flat rate and you're kind of ripping me off? NO! Thats the profit I made... its certainly not interest. Ok.. what if I needed cash, how are you going to get your profit? Here is the plan. I'll sell you this Diamond for 1,000 BD, and you can pay me in installments over a year... now take this Diamond over there to the nice bank agent over there, and he will buy back the diamond from you for 700 BD. This is how I can rip you off without giving you 700 and recieving 1000 and getting the good lord upset.

Of course there are the exorcists that charge by the hour like a practitioner, to rid their patients of evil spirits, and the people in the Holy land tour bus business, that arrives in Mecca and people brim out of the bus like a pinata exploded.

Suicide

2005-10-24T00:20:00.000+03:00

* Another of Yippy yo yippy yay's contributions.

Why would someone kill him/herself?

Is there any difference between suicide and martyr? If any, who differentiates which is which? What is the basis of such distinction?

Were all the martyrs/suicides convinced with the idea or they were battered and humiliated by reasons other than the occupations like family humiliation, poverty, depression, harassment, "spouselessness"? Could these reasons before the rationality to defend killing oneself?

Did it cross their minds (suicide or martyrs) that their news of their death would be just one –second news in our media and people who initially blessed their actions so vividly will forget their "noble sacrifice" by tomorrow? I guess we will never know!

Did these actions do any good to any of us? If you are a father or a mother, would you like to see your dearest son/daughter full of his/her blood after blowing him/herself up in the name of "freedom of the nations", while the rest of their peers are enjoying their lives?

For parents who commit suicide, would their kids forgive them after leaving them alone in this life, living in orphanages or as a burden on relatives to feed, educate and look after them?

Is the Almighty going to rest the soul of a suicide/martyr in paradise while his kids lack support, sympathy and affection all because his father /mother all of a sudden decides to blow him/herself up for the nation's deliverance?

As a kid, opening the eyes to the world empty from parents who intentionally decided to disappear from his life, which one is he going to begrudge more, his parents or the occupations? What would he think when he grows up and starts to think" did it do any good"? Well you little cute cuddly boy, I am sorry to tell you that it did not do any good but adding more to your misery, if it is considered any good to your parents, dear?

Top intellects

2005-10-22T11:45:00.000+03:00

* "Yippy yo yippy yay" emailed this piece to me. Please enjoy.

http://www.prospectmagazine.co.uk/intellectuals/results

Despite the comfort I felt when I went through the results of the poll because of ranking professor Chomsky on the top of the list, it sounds rather weird to have yousuf alqaradawi on the same list. Why? Because the majority of the listed intellectuals exerted all the efforts to stand up for criticizing repugnant regimes policies and hegemony every where, fight for human rights everywhere, and support the spirit of resistance for better lives while Mr. Alqaradawi and Mr. Ali al Sistani, spent the whole 2004 in pronouncing their command to the public about participating in Iraqi voting (and for those who fails to vote will be burned in, as if Mr. Sistani is the holy guardian) or to kill all the Americans in Iraq including civilians( because for Mr. Alqaradawi the distinction between military and citizen has vanished) and when they are faced with tremendous censure, they put the blame on the media which "miss-quoted" them. We never heard from both of them, not even once that they censured any of the dictator regimes, never made a speech on how people in other parts of the word are suffering from hegemony and imperialism. What are the books, which really indicate their intellectuality?

Thank you once again, yippy yo yippy yay. Keep them coming.

Transparency

2005-10-20T14:59:00.000+03:00

http://ww1.transparency.org/cpi/2005/dnld/cpi2005.highlights_africa.pdf

Transparency international came up with their list of most transparent countries. Iceland apparently took pole position, and Bangladesh and chad were the not so champions. Zooming into the region; Oman ranks 1st, followed by the UAE, Qatar, Bahrain, Jordan...etc. Hmmm. A week ago the Omani government came out with a Medieval law allowing them to repossess any GCC national owned land just for the fuck of it... They weren't transparent enough to disclose that clause now, where they? It basically means spend money or we take whats yours. Well what if he wanted to hold on to it, so it appreciates in value? I'm afraid thats not going to happen. How about this for transparency.. They started some major projects in Suhar.. I don't know if they're real developments or just smoke and mirrors, and quickly hung up billboards in Bahrain and elsewhere asking people to buy lands in Oman... apparently you can't buy a plot of land within a developmental area... you're deceived into piece of land in the middle of the sahara desert... I've heard stories about these plots not having blue prints... the closest you get to a visualization is a handheld video camera.... even that piece of property can be taken away from you for the least market value they can find....

I'm going to skip over the silver and bronze medal....Bahrain deserves a consolation prize... I mean.. CEOs of major telecommunications companies spend a good portion of their productive day chasing fancy mobile phone numbers.. trying to get a hold of them.. and giving them out as friendship gestures. We have fictional land plots 2 kilometers offshore changing hands right now... I wonder who bought it off of whom exactly? I bet its someone with a nice mobile phone number and a pretty decent license plate on his car. As if getting their hands on public land isnt enough, they get illegal labor for the cheap to start up construction, and freelance their rent with government and semi government entities that apparently decide to be generous with these people for some reason...

This report looks to me like the British Crown's popularity contest... because honestly... this is the one sport we really compete with each other in... and lets be honest.. Oman would rank first there.. and Bahrain not far behind... Saudi Arabia needs to get in shape... I'll give them a tip.. pick up a fat Weapons Contract from the Royal Air Force... those old tanks and jet fighters might cost you a bit.. but sure will improve your rank.

If Bahrain and Oman are at the top.... I am filled with dread when I try to imagine what goes on in the bottom half. How fucked up is it down there?

Dubai in Denial

2005-10-17T15:33:00.000+03:00

For formula one fans, you guys know what I'm talking about. Back in 2003, when Bahrain was racing against the clock to put everything in place for the F1 event, Dubai started to build an Autodome for some reason. The "new track"event in the F1 Calender was in Bahrain in 2004, and Turkey in 2005.. but yeah.. seems like all the cool kids have it.. lets buy one too... too bad it doesnt work that way... so under "The shaikh's wisdom and guidance" they come up with a cunning plan... instead of F1.. we're gonna call it A1! Didnt see that one coming did you? Too bad it doesnt work that way either.. So here's another idea... we'll spend 360 million on a copy cat theme park of our neighbor's event that costs a fraction of that amount... maybe by then Bernie eccelstone can finally see that he have lots of cash!
Dubai... snap out of it! You are in denial. The reason why Bahrain is the capital of motor sports is because we do it with passion. The young men and women that volunteer to make these events a success don't pocket a single fils. We love these sports so much the top two formula drivers in Asia are Bahraini... Now go find something you REALLY loved.. not what others are doing.. go race your camels.. or trot on his highness's horses in France or England.

The Simpsons

2005-10-15T18:03:00.000+03:00

on MBC, at around 7:30, the cartoon clouds and the famous violin "the simpsons" theme song starts....only one thing wrong.. the names are in arabic.. and the show is lip synced...Instead of Homer.. they cleverly changed it to Omar... and Bart is now Badr.... what a trick.. bravo!

I, personally, am a die hard simpsons fan. I've seen all their series except the last one.. and I'll soon do something about it.... what they're doing in MBC is utterly stupid.. what happened to inginuity? creative thinking? Are they going to spend the rest of their careers in media living off of hollywood's garbage? They're putting themselves behind the curve... others get to come up with valuable entertainment and these folks dilute it into puns and punchlines that don't really translate.. its not only not fair to the audience.. but to the original creator of the show!

If you look at old 70's and early 80's comedy series and comical plays produced in Kuwait and Egypt.. they are way up and above the crap they're feeding us nowadays! Is it because we have a million satellite channels and the synergy is lost in so many channels? Or is it too commercialised now that they're looking for a quick sell? I'm really not sure... but what I am sure of is if you keep on translating what others do... you will never get ahead... your pace is stuck at the pace of the person in front of you.

Same goes with the science books. They're either translated in Egypt or in Syria. The funny thing is you can see big variations in both publications of the same book sometimes.. I think its not healthy at all.

I wish the folks on MBC got their writers and cast to think of something original.. at least so the jokes translate.

Lady luck settles in Manama

2005-10-13T00:47:00.000+03:00

I mean this in a good way. How the fuck did we get this close to Germany 2006? We only won one game in Korea... and the rest were all draws and losses. The same thing happened in the Asian cup 2004. The only team we beat was Indonesia, and the rest were all ties... Most memorable was none other than Uzbekistan.. poor lads.. they REALLY have a sour taste in their mouths from the Bahrain jersey now.. we slid them out of the Asia cup and the world cup.. just by tieing with them...

One of my favorite sayings is "fortune favors the brave." We were brave enough to push for it over in Tashkand... and the boys tried real hard over here.. its not like they didnt... but I guess if you take your chances and don't succeed... you're still better off not conceiding.

For the last play-offs.... I wish we don't tie over there 1-1 and tie here 0-0. All the other teams will be like... how did you win one game and get here?

Kuwait's young and finest

2005-10-10T20:59:00.000+03:00

I got this email earlier today. I don't know whats sadder.. the newspiece.. or the commentary... please read.

صعق اهل الكويت من خبر احتجاز فتاتان كويتيتان في ولاية اريزونا الامريكيه ، بسبب اصطدامهم لاحد الامريكيين وقتله في الحال وهروبهم من موقع الحادث .الصاعقه ليست لانهم كويتيتان ، وليس لانهم تسببوا في مقتل احد الامريكيين ، وليس لانهم هربوا من موقع الحادث ، بل ان المصيبه العظمى هو اعتقالهم بعد 15 دقيقه وهم تحت تأثير السكر والمخدرات.؟؟؟؟؟؟؟ نعم يا اخوان ....... لقد كانت الفتاتان سكارى وتحت تأثير المخدرات ........وبسبب سكرهم ، قامت احدى الفتاتين بدهس امريكي في الشارع .والمصيبه الثانيه الاعظم ، ان الفتاتين هم بنات شخصيتان كويتيتان هامه ومعروفه لدى المجتمع الكويتي والخليجي والعربي :الفتاة الاولى واسمها ( منيره علي الطراح - 22 سنه - بنت مدير المكتب الاعلامي الكويتي في لندن )والفتاة الثانيه واسمها ( ريم احمد بشاره - 19 سنه - بنت احد رموز العلمانيين الكويتيين في حزب الديمقراطيين، وهي ايضا بنت اخ الامين العام السابق لمجلس التعاون الخليجي )والمصيبه الثالثه العظمى ، هو استنفار الحكومه الكويتيه بكامل اجهزتها ممثله بوزير الخارجيه الكويتيه ووكيلة وزارة التعليم العالي والسفير الكويتي في واشنطن ، وتم دفع كفاله ماليه قدرها 300 الف دولار من خزينة الحكومه الكويتيه ، بالاضافه الى ضمان السفاره المعنوي من اجل اخراج الفتاتين من السجن .....

هذه الاخبار الموثقه هي من موقع اخباري امريكي يدعى CBS وهو على الرابط التالي

http://www.kpho.com/global/story.AsP?S=3855794&nav=23KueZKr

لمشاهدة فلم للفتاتين في المحكمه - اضغط هنا للمشاهده

لو كانت تلك الفتاتان بنات احد الاشخاص العامين ، لما استنفرت الحكومه باجهزتها واموالها من اجلهم ......فلو كانت الفتاتين في وضع طبيعي - مو سكرانات ومدمنات - وبصحبة اهلهم ، لقلنا ، ان الواجب يحتم علينا مساعدتهم ......ولكن هاتين الفتاتين هما من حثالة بنات الكويت ، وهما بنات شخصيات عامه في البلد ، واحدهم مدير المكتب الاعلامي الكويتي في لندن ، الذي تقع على كاهله رفع اسم الكويت في اوروبا كبلد اسلامي وعربي دستوره الاسلام الذي يحرم شرب الخمر وخروج الفتاة بدون محرم ، والعيش في بلد اجنبي بمفردها ، وابتعادها عن مراقبة اهلها لسلوكها الاخلاقي ، ومنعها من الالتقاء بالرجال واقامة الصداقه معهم ، وممارسة الرذيله والعهر .قد يقول لي شخص ، انت لم ترى بعينك حياة الفتاتين في امريكا ، وارد عليه واقول : الا يكفي احتجاز الفتاتين تحت تأثير الخمر والمخدرات وتسببهم في دهس احد الماره ؟؟؟؟؟؟ الشرهه مو على اهل الفتاتين ....... بل الشرهه على الحكومه التي ساعدت من لا يستحق المساعده ، وفي نفس الوقت - الان - يعاني 11 اسير كويتي في سجن غوانتنامو ويتعرضون لابشع صور التعذيب والاهانه ، ومضربين عن الطعام ؟؟؟؟؟اين اموالكم ونفوذكم يا حكومة الكويت؟؟؟؟ من انقاذ خيرة الشباب الكويتي الملتزم ، الذي ترك الرفاهيه ونفاق الدنيا وذهبوا الى افغانستان يعلمون الناس القران والحديث ويساعدون الضعيف غريب امر حكومة الكويت ..... لعل مجلس الامه يتكلم بهذا الشأن ..... ويترك المجاملات وحب الخشوم وتضييع وقتهم في مخالفة قوانين البلد والتوسط من اجل مخالفة القوانين ؟؟؟؟؟اللهم احفظ الكويت وشعبها من كل مكروه ، وان يشفي اميرها وولي عهدها من المرض ، لكي يقودوا الكويت الى بر الامان والطمأنينه لقد كانت الكويت مصدرا من مصادر الدفاع عن الدين الاسلامي في العالم ، اما الان فانها اصبحت - مع الحكومه الحاليه - مصدرا لمحاربة التبرعات والجهاد في سبيل الله .خلوني ساكت احسن ...قبل ما اطينها

Hraar

2005-10-07T03:04:00.000+03:00

My favorite word in Bahraini slang is "hraar". In arabic its written هرار. It basically means Bullshit. Someone asks: What was the speech about? Answer: Hraar about democracy and unity... the usual hraar. Someone thats feeding you the bullshit is usually referred to as a "Harraaar" with a special emphasis on the rolling R's. This word is very useful in your every day life. The newspaper in the morning usually has a couple of hraar headlines talking about bogus investments, or hraar about politicians dicing up this country for their own benefit, then there is the hraar TV and radio that waste 3 minutes of precious airtime about "exchanging cables of good wishes".... and since the 16th of december is coming up... my morning commute will be tarnished with hraar on billboards congradulating the people about the occassion... when in reality its petty businessmen trying to land fat government contracts.
Another form of hraar is "one of the many national airlines, but I won't name it" would cancel your booking so someone else can take your seat. When you start to complain, they explain that this is normal procedure.. and that there must be a mistake of some sort... and that they'll make sure you'll arrive on time.. and every thing is taken care of.... just try to catch the next flight.

Ramadan Kareem

2005-10-07T01:58:00.000+03:00

I was fretting for the last two weeks about ramadan... how the hunger strike is going to get to my head... and how restraining from 10 things is going to be unbareable.... but I forgot what ramadan was all about until it started... Its about sleeping all day.. smoking shisha all night.... going to big buffet tents... over-doing what you couldn't do during the daytime... and watching cheap comedy shows.

Our dinner table at home for example... usually we don't have dessert after a meal.... why do we decide to have three types of desserts during ramadan? Wasn't it supposed to be living like poor people so we understand what they go through? If poor people ate heavy meals, smoked shisha at night, and woke up late every morning... I think earning an income is over-rated then.

Some people give you an attitude during the day since they're fasting... I understand.. they're addicted to smoking and feel hungry... but don't they have something to reflect on at night? I think rather than fasting... we should have a month where everyone has to read 1 book every week.... I think that would be much better... people would have something to think about... and probably learn something new.

Contraditions

2005-10-01T13:56:00.000+03:00

Why do we live with so much contradictions in Bahrain? Why are we very selective when being judgemental? For example, when Nanci Ajram came to town for a one night stand, hell broke loose. We had the honorable ma'awda brainwash a bunch of young men that decided to flip into hooligans that night... smashing car windows at the concert, and older men carrying slander banners at the entrance..... Hmmmm.... isnt that funny? I don't remember anyone getting upset when Michael Jackson came to Bahrain AND BOUGHT A FUCKING HOUSE !!

Another example of this... when Alwifaq broke up... Shaikh Ali Salman said the reason they did that was because America and the United Kingdom don't recognize a society thats not registered... and of course we need their support..... Excuse me, Shaikh.... aren't you and the rest of the turban clowns following "wilaayat Al Faqeeh" - Leader of the muslims in Iran or whatever?
And this goes back to the London seminar... we have Hassan Mushaima', the conservative hawk, flying to london to find it in the english government's hearts to turn around to Bahrain to see the domestic issues we have.... uhh excuse me... didnt you guys have a problem with the US and the UK butting in Iraq about the WMD, and you'll start doing the same song and dance if they turn over to Iran? So what is it now, people? Do you want to go kiss their ass to get them here, or do you want them to stay out?
I guess thats because we are a society that can easily hold two contradicting positions, and not have a problem with it.. I read an article in the newspaper.. this man was going through the security check at the Airport, and he had a small nailcutter or something of that sort... and the guard was like... Sir, you need to take these stuff from the small handbag and put them in the big bag... he was like no its too much of a hasstle.... Security man was like.. THESE ARE SECURITY MEASURES... you either follow them or you won't be flying today... so the guy does what he was asked to do.. and mumbles to himself "its all because of that son of a bitch bin laadin.. if it wasn't for that mother-bitch, we wouldn't have had to go through all this bullshit!" And the security guard gets FURIOUS! HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT BIN LAADIN LIKE THAT?! BIN LADIN IS THE BEACON OF ISLAM!! God sent him to protect us from the infidels that want to tumble Islam.... Now I feel much safer next time I'll be flying.. these fine young men will make sure terrorists won't harm us... unless they're sent by Bin Ladin...

Start implementing Islamic Laws

2005-09-29T15:26:00.000+03:00

I had a revelation. I was blind, but now I can see. I think we should practice full Islamic rules and regulations in our courts... believe you me, it will curb crime.

Basically we should start chopping shit off. Someone pickpocketed an old lady.. chop his hand off... someone trespassing.. chop off his foot.... someone committed rape... CHOP OFF HIS PENIS!

"Ohh please judge... I won't do it again!!"
The judge would say "I KNOW YOU WON'T, MOTHERFUCKER, YOU WON'T HAVE A DICK TO DO IT!"

Its like when I was growing up.. If I kicked the football around the house and broke a window or something.. my mom would take it and stick a needle into it. If you can't play with your toys the right way, you can't have them.

My Opinions (Part 1)

2005-09-27T06:39:00.000+03:00

1. Star Academy is World Cup for girls and gays.
2. There should be a law against roaming around crowded areas without an apparent reason.
3. If we could vote for someone we really hated once every month, and a commission would ship him/her to Antartica, the world would be a better place, and Alsaeedi would be sent packin'.
4. Why does Hollywood refer to actors that had one or two hits as stars? What is it now? the Porn industry?
5. How can they build shuttles that orbit the earth tens of years, and can't make a car that doesnt break down in 2 years?

Green PARTY!!

2005-09-25T18:10:00.000+03:00

I was walking through the streets of Zurich, and I decided to have a break in a very famous Square there... where they have all the bars and restaurants on the street... and I saw these couple of teenagers.. approaching all the pedestrians with flyers that have green leaves on them. Someone that looked like their leader, half-cast, with long rastafi hair was coordinating their presence. I assumed they were a group that was trying to lobby support for hashish and hashish accessories. Although I try to avoid it as much as possible, I find myself on the slippery slope of prejudice from time to time. Later that night, I walk back the same square to find these kids huddled up... and looks to me like they were briefing each other about what was going on.... I needed to put out the curiousity in me.. so I asked the rastafi... "what are you guys doing? is this sort of a movement?" All of them looked at me at once and said "No its not really a movement.. we are an organization that wants to preserve nature and keep Switzerland clean from toxic waste." It was just humbling. When I was a teenager all I worried about was girls, cars, football, and loud music instruments.... these young men and women spent their weekend trying to spread awareness and try to recruit members.... wow... they asked me if I liked to join... I told them I wasn't a swiss resident.. Im just here for a short while... but I really support the good work you do... their faces lit up.. and I kept walking.

Represent

2005-09-21T19:08:00.000+03:00

I'm attending a seminar, thats why I haven't been around much... we have all these delegates from Europian countries... some african... Mostly EU countries.. and two middle eastern countries.. and I'm from one of them. We have either 1 or 2 people from these countries.. but we have 2 australians... one representing the folks down under... and another Australian lady representing the UAE. Apparently she comes to the Bank of International Settlements for all these events. Now I am wondering... Dubai is going about constructing huge cities and beaches... did they fail to produce a local that can comprehend simple analysis and communication skills? I mean you have all this money.. and we listen about fairy tale projects.. sky scrapers and man made islands and all kinds of concrete and dirt piled up in different shapes and sizes...
Honestly its a blue print for development in the middle east. We are superficial. We dress up our nightline... but did not do our homework and educate generations after generations...
I had long talks with this lady... she's a lovely person.. and apparently very good at what she does... but I wonder ... after the oil dries up... is she still going to be around? What will dubai do with all these nice buildings with no occupants (like this australian lady) to fill them?
This by all means does not mean we are better than them. They just gave me a very nice example.

Good Morning Batelco

2005-09-17T13:56:00.000+03:00

Batelco, my service provider, last time I paid 100% of my bill.... now why the fuck do you provide me with 50% of the service? for the last couple of days you have cut me off from the outside world... you dried out my blog... and I couldn't get timely information... and most importantly.. I was going to do some work at home and email it to myself so I can finish it up after the weekend... Thanks to you all that is gone up in smoke....

How dare you talk about Bahraini employees not giving in a full effort? Well guess where they learned that unproductive attitude from? And when I call up to tell you the service is weak don't dismiss it with "what error message are you getting?" and trying to lose me so you won't have to deal with my headache.

A friend of mine works there... He snobbishly exlaims every once in a while.." Do you know that Batelco isn't making profit from their internet service?" As if they're doing it out of the goodness of their heart! Well then, Mr. Telecom, if they're not, WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T THEY ALLOW ANYONE ELSE AN INTERNET PROVIDER LICENSE FOR TEN YEARS?!! Of course they're going to be losing. The service is crap and the support is crappier... the way they look at it, since they're a monopoly, the more the customers at this point, the more the headache.... thats why they try to fend off customers from the service... simply because they don't want to bother... what kind of business is that??

You usually have a stict cut off policy in terms of billing. Would you like it if I gave the bill a haircut and just paid you for the days the service was provided??

Lets try out the newsletter

2005-09-11T23:09:00.000+03:00

Hear Ye Hear Ye !
Dear bloggers of Bahrain and beyond, please help me kick start a Bahraini blog-letter. I don't know how successful its going to be, but if you all could be kind enough to send me your favorite post in the last three months or so, that would be highly appreciated. What I'm going to do is gather this comprehensive text, try to get a slick designer to fine tune it, show the electronic version to a publisher, and see if the publisher can take it from there. If we can work out a monthly, or a quarterly publication, that would be great.

Here are the steps. Choose your favorite article, send it as an email to yalajaji@yahoo.com, and put the title of the post in the subject line. You can attach some sort of picture or a symbol. And please sign off with your name (or nickname) and your url. Please pass the message along.

As for myself, I'm torn between:

Real Estate, is it?

Arranged Marrige

Which one should I put in there? Help me reach a decision.

Please help me start off this project. I'm sure everyone can contribute. Good luck.

Stupid Thought

2005-09-09T10:40:00.000+03:00

Here is a stupid thought for today.. since Ramadan is around the corner.
Why don't we start fasting from sunset to sunrise rather than the other way around?

1. We will be much healthier.
2. Work flow/work hours will not get shortened and re-arranged, with more productivity.
3. People will go to bed early, with less drunks driving around.
4. People will wake up early and make use of the day.

Some Beach

2005-09-07T06:29:00.000+03:00

Driving down the interstate
Running thirty minutes late
Singing Margaritaville and minding my own
Some foreign car drivin' dude
with the road rage attitude
Pulled up beside me talking on his cell phone
He started yelling at me like I did something wrong
He flipped me the bird an' then he was gone

Some beach..Somewhere
There's a big umbrella casting shade over an empty chair
Palm trees are growing and a warm breezes blowing
I picture myself sitting there
On Some beach, somewhere

I circled the parking lot
trying to find a spot
Just big enough I could park my old truck
A man with a big cigar
was getting into his car
I stopped and I waited for him to back up
From out of no where a Mercedes Benz
Came cursing up and whipped right in

Some beach...Somewhere
There's no where to go when you got all day to get there
There's cold margaritas and hot Senoritas
smiling with long dark hair
On some beach...Somewhere

I sit in that waiting room
It seemed like all afternoon
The nurse finally said doc's ready for you
you won't feel a thing
we'll give you some novivcane
That tooth will be fine in a minute or two
But he stuck that needle down deep in my gum
And he started drilling before I was numb

Some beach..Somewhere
There's a beautiful sunset burning up the atsmosphere
There's music and dancing...and lovers romancing
In the soft evening air
On some beach...Somewhere

Artist: Shelton Blake
Lyrics for Song: Some Beach
Album: Blake Shelton's Barn & Grill

Community Service

2005-09-05T16:57:00.000+03:00

Today I saw a couple of lads that look like they got themselves in trouble being lead by policemen in the Courts/Public prosecution area. I heard a little while ago that the minister of interior was kind enough to get the inmates at the Jao prison Aljazeera sports access after it was scrambled, so they can enjoy the spanish league... He seems to me like a moderate fellow you can talk sense to.... So I'll propose something, and I hope one of the informers that look over the blogs and websites is kind enough to include it in his/her report to the secret investigation department.. and maybe they can show it to the minister, and if lightning can strike twice in the same spot, there is a chance he might like it.

Mr. Minister, how about we introduce community service to the penal system we have in Bahrain? Rather than waste money hiring guards, satellite dishes, nasty food, and police cars, how about take a different route with juveniles? Taking them to prison just exposes them to bad role models... people most likely in for bigger crimes... just like that movie "the usual suspects"

For example.. you catch a drunk kid wrecking daddy's car... dont just throw him in jail and slap him with a fine... make him do 40 hours of... lets say.. cleaning the street he had his accident in? First of all, you taught him a very valuable lesson about the environment he has a stake in, and is responsible on keeping safe for himself and everyone else, and second, you saved money on hiring someone to sweep the street.

A bunch of kids get in a fight, for example. Throwing them in the joint might lead to things like... getting used to the legal system... a sense of apathy next time they think of committing a crime, or a backlash that might make it hard for them to get back to mainstream society. How about you give them 40 hours of taking care of the elderly, for example? Its a nice social initiative too.

I think we will have a more responsible generation... eheh and cheap labor

London Seminar

2005-09-03T14:40:00.000+03:00

Gentlemen, thank you for your time and effort organizing an event attended by a few, and controversial for many. Now why did you choose to have it over there? The building where you had your nice, fancy powerpoint slides was the same establishment that put the ruling family you so madly hate in power. Did you know that, mr patriot? Now explain to me why talking about corruption 6000 miles away is a good idea? Wouldn't the presentation sound more intelligent in the place its talking about?
I mean I criticized the government before about cheap shots for popularity stunts, but playing the exiled, unjustified, man of the people is out of its time now. Please make use of the little freedoms we have right now... Don't shrink yourself to outcasts, or else you'll be stuck there.

And another thing. Mr. Ibraheem Shareef, I know lots of members of your family. Ma Shalla they are very professional at their work. Why does your presentation have many mistakes ? I mean forget the understated and blown out of proportion numbers in revenue; I'm talking spelling and grammatical mistakes. Did you write up that presentation in a hurry? Don't worry... London and popularity won't go anywhere.

Honestly, I would love to hear a presentation from you. Next time please take more time to make it realistic and presentable, and please make it around here so I can attend. Thank you.

Satellite Dish

2005-08-30T06:30:00.000+03:00

Beniamin Natenyahu visited the town where I lived in central Texas mid 2000. He was there to collect money and contributions from evangelical churches and religious establishments for Israel. In a ceremonial event, he gave a long speech about the Middle East region. He figures that Israel deserves support because it is the only real democracy in the region. He thinks Israel's neighbors can be good people, but are lead by tyrrants, so he doesnt trust them as of yet. There was this part of his monologue which I found very interesting. When he started talking about Iran, he said "I told William Cohen (former secertary of defense) you don't need to spend all these billions of dollars keeping your army ready, and spending billions more on spy planes and intelligence programs to take care of Iran. All you need is a big big satellite dish pointed at Iran, and just show them the programming we have here. Show them Beverly Hills 9020 or whatever (Beverly Hills 90210.) Let the young generation over there see how nice freedom is. Let them revolt and overthrow their government. Your work is practically done for you."

He argues that when the Irani teenager, or young adult, watches the fancy BMW's, the display of affection with attractive young ladies, the free and flamboyant lifestyle, he might think to himself..."Hey.. why don't I live like that? Maybe its because I have a corrupt government in power that wants to keep me in a bird cage using religion as an excuse?! I feel like going out in the streets and demonstrating against the ayotollas!"

What he said made lots of sense to me.

Crime and Punishment

2005-08-27T19:34:00.000+03:00

* this post was sent in by one of the readers, Exclusive. Your contributions are more than welcome.

Crime and Punishment

A few weeks ago a friend of mine was talking about the recent dramatic increase in the number of crimes in specific burglaries in Bahrain. She said and quiet seriously "the government should have those bastard thieves' hands chopped off!". I simply objected and everybody was against me as I'm sure some of you are now.

The Islamic Shari'ah mentioned that before sentencing the criminal for punishment, certain rules shall apply, and each crime has its own set of rules. Those crimes are:

1.Murder
2.Brigandage and plunder.
3.High treason.
4.Defamation.
5.Adultery
6.Theft.

The Holy Qur'an states that the first three crimes have a fixed punishment which is capital punishment because they are crimes against God's law. However, Defamation and Adultery's punishment is neither death, nor stoning or strangling but limited whipping. Theft's punishment, on the other hand, and as we all know, cutting the hand. The Islamic judge is required to look at a higher level of proof and reasons why the person committed the crime. A judge can only impose the punishment when a person confesses to the crime or there are enough witnesses to the crime. The usual number of witnesses is two (two men or a man and two women's testimony). In the case of adultery, however, four witnesses are required. When there is doubt about the guilt of a crime or there is no confession to a crime or not enough witnesses to the crime, the judge must treat the crime as a lesser one.

"You can't go chopping people's hands off!" I said but no one dare asked me why. It's not that I'm against Islam, but Islam isn't an easy-to-handle religion. It needs a certain amount of thoroughness and carefulness when applied. As we all know, our judicial system is a joke and may I say corrupt beyond imagination?! So how in God's name do you want "our respectable judges" to sentence a criminal to death or have his/her hand chopped off when there are people who are hungry, homeless, unemployed…etc? The answer to the dramatic increase in number of crimes, in my opinion, is harder punishment; YES!!! But first feed the hungry, shelter the homeless and employ the unemployed; clean our courts from the corruption they are so deeply buried under. Let the people feel safe and secure and after that if and when they steal, chop off their hands and I will gladly be the first to applaud.

"When a town grows, crime grows with it".
Victor Hugo

ExCluSivE

Food Online

2005-08-26T15:25:00.000+03:00

A couple of friends of mine were telling me about this website. There is a number of restaurants, with each restaurant's menu uploaded. You get to order your meal online, and have a subscription. They deliver it for you if its over a minimum amount.
Now I'm wondering, is this site registered with the Ministry of Information? If yes, then they're barring out ideas, innovation, culture, free speech, and information, but want to keep track of who's ordering a shish kebab tonight? If not, then there is a double standard. Why should some websites register and some don't have to? Because a grand total of 82 registered websites does not lead me to suspect that webmasters are being chased by the secret police to get moving to the MOI with an application form and a fee.
Here is another thing. We are a nation that wants to stuff itself.. too lazy to drive down the street to get a meal, and could care less about our personal freedoms and our rights to think? What upsets me is that the MOI is not putting an effort to embellish their appearance, or try to win the public opinion over, because... honestly.. who gives a fuck if the law passed or not? As long as Im getting my happy meal without minimal effort..... everything's fine and dandy.

Its a bit old, but it doesnt happen everyday

2005-08-22T17:32:00.000+03:00

Syrian born artist, Hala Faisal, protests the war in Iraq and the occupation of Palestine by appearing in the nude with anti-war slogans written in both English and Arabic, in Washington Square Park Tuesday, Aug. 9, 2005, in New York City.

Syrian born artist and actress/singer Hala Faisal has shown her work to wide acclaim in Europe as well as the Middle East. After completing a BFA at Damascus University, she studied at the High Institute of Cinema at Moscow and Ecole des Beaux Arts in Paris. Her acting and singing career includes movies and performances in Syria, the former Soviet Union, and the United States. She has also worked as a graphic artist and lecturer on the history of art.

Dear Mr. Dawood,

2005-08-20T16:12:00.000+03:00

Dear Mr. Dawood, before I clean your clock with your redicilus middle age law, I have a question. Why did it take you three months to register 82 websites to begin with? You are doing a horrible job keeping a leash on us. As a citizen, I demand to know why a public office with the budget it has needs 3 months to register 82 websites? I can do it in one hour ! These are the kind of people that are supposed to keep an eye on us? If you're going to give us a hard time, can you at least do a decent job at it? Whats more humiliating to the outside world? We have to register a personal website with a government entity? Or that it takes 3 months to do it?

Now let me ask you another question. Why do you choose to come up with the amazing project you and your crew have taken upon yourselves, just days after Bahrain was ranked 3rd most dangerous country to blog in? 3rd place aint that good anymore, huh? We've GOT TO BE NUMBER ONE ! Thats the Bahraini spirit ! Better luck next time. Hard luck.

Sir, does it make you proud to have Bahrain with China, Iran, and Syria in the same breath, in terms of free speech? I mean we used to compete with eastern european countries in terms of personal freedom maybe... im fine with Egypt and Malaysia... but China and Iran? This is low.

Mr. Dawood, please don't be offended, but you can only find Ministries of Information in third world, under-developed countries, that need a monopolized source of information to attempt disguising a corrupt government.

In Bahrain, we amuse ourselves that we're moving towards reform and transparency. Please don't take that away from us. We're so transparent we have a list of everyone that maintains a website. Please find another day Job and cancel out the MOI. Its a prime location on two streets. We can use the office space down there.

Good luck explaining in your next job interview, after they close down the MOI, why it took you three months to register 82 websites.

2005-08-18T17:47:00.000+03:00

Tariq Khonji, Mahmood Al Yousif, Scorpio, emoodz and myself have discussed and exchanged views about the bahraini blog landscape a number of times. The most interesting point of debate is what I would call talking to the mirror. It seems that most of us are preaching to the quire, or explaining to a farmer that rain is good. The message is already recieved, thats why most of our discussions and interactions are over little detail points, like how white is white, or what came first the chicken or the egg.

Last blogger meet-up, I told the guys that we have a big, wide main-stream. There are folks to the right of the mainstream, locked up in Guantanamo bay, or yelling bloody murder at a microphone in a religious society; and then there is us, the Bahraini bloggers, to the left of the main-stream. What we do is all fair and nice, but the problem is we sit in a circle together and throw back the same chewed up toys. Hijab, terrorists, and employment are usually common themes. They are very good ones at that, but they're just going around in circles, and not very far.

What I suggest is, we start some sort of a newsletter. I propose a monthly electronic, or a paper publication (if there is funding.) We can have an informal committee that picks out the best articles and posts every month, edit and format something suave and savvy, and kick it into mass media. We can send them out as forward emails, throw out stacks at supermarkets, and if its really good, we can get a promoter to pick it up from there and make profits from advertisements.

We need more people that disagree with most of us. We need people that might understand, and others that might not. I feel that if we keep on communicating to a replica, we will lose our edge and turn into yesterday's news without knowing it.

Work Ethic

2005-08-14T14:55:00.000+03:00

Some people just have their names on the payroll just because downsizing is taboo. They have nothing to do all day long but to either talk on the phone, bother other employees trying to do their job, or go about taking care of their own private business. Since they hung around for the last decade or two, its somehow an obligation to pay them just to keep on hanging around. Whats funny is, we were supposed to re-locate as a department, and these old fucks screwed me out of my assigned office space. They play with their balls all day long, while my job requires privacy, walk-in visits, and one-on-one meetings. I got thrown in the back, while they just whine and bitch and moan to the superiors, until they got their way not because they are convincing, but because top management really can't take it anymore. They know I wont put a fight because I want the job done, while they have no other thing to occupy their minds other than petty stuff.

One thing I learned about employee behavior is that qualified people never complain about their job. If they are underpaid and overworked or something in between, because they sure know that they can move to another job. They have confidence in themselves to pick up somewhere else and build a career. Folks that complain about their job are usually the type that did nothing in their youth, didnt try to learn or improve, and somehow the world has passed them by. The reason why they complain is because they know that where they are at is the best they can get. No one else will hire them, so they're stuck with what they're given.

Thats why they worry about stupid stuff like which office to play with their balls in!

Heaven & Hell

2005-08-12T00:36:00.000+03:00

* Reference to the previous post.

So I was thinking, are these the people we're going to meet in heaven? In the Quran it says
" على الأرائك ينظرون" Which means the good folks will be sitting on leather couches watching the rest of us not-so-brilliant bunch. If I walk into heaven, and found the person I met sitting on a couch there, whats my life for eternity gonna be like? Don't we think to ourselves, why does the person that invented vaccines and antibiotics and saved millions of humans, probably a christian, ends up burning in hell while the fellow that doesnt like to see Shi'a, women, or most human beings; and is ready to blow them up, is going to sit on a couch and laugh at him while eating a banana?
Honestly, If I went to heaven and saw that guy again... I'm going to ask God to take me down to hell... at least Im going to meet Bob Marley and Elvis down there..

Someone I met today

2005-08-09T17:06:00.000+03:00

I got a call this morning from my colleague. She was busy with something else and wanted me to consult someone on some sort of investment he had in mind. I told the security man to let him in. In walks this short guy, with long hair to his back, fuzzy beard, a big-ass red head wear (ghutra) with no black top to keep it in place (uqal,) since it was invented after the prophet walked the earth, and short, dirty clothes (thoub.)

He took a seat, and after the prolonged hellos and how-are-you's, he went on to explain that he was interested in getting people's money and investing it. "Well, how?" I asked. He explained with very primal terms what he intended. I walked out and brought him back some standard conditions and consultation papers about Investment Banks since they were the only vehicle that can legally act as he explained. He looks at them and says"why is everything around here in english? I went to the Imam university.. I never learned English."

I go back to explaining different investment types, and he interrupts "You keep on saying end of the year, end of the year... Which one do you mean? Arabic or english?" Gregorian calender you caveman!! I explained that we use the satanic calendar, so he was like " what are we now, 7-7 ?" I was like "more like 9-aug." Very well. He finished explaining his bogus investment plans and asked "are you busy? I see you always looking at the door?" Honestly, I was nervous. I cant hold a straight face anymore. It's like avoiding mentioning a white elephant sitting in the living room.
He finished his session, and said "Can I ask you a personal question?" I thought he was going to ask about my Saudi Surname or something of that sort. I said Fine. He was like, its personal, wont you feel offended? I was wondering what he was up to. He was like "Are you sunni?" I was Shocked! I managed to squeak a yes.. He was like "yeah.. you look like one. Are there any rafitha around here?" Rafitha is a racist slang term used by wahhabis to label Shi'ites. It means rejects- rejecting true islam.
I was still shocked... I tried to say something... all I could manage was... We dont have this sort of stuff around here.... We are all one in front of God.

He said "No we're not!".... Gave me his back, and left.

Digital Hookers

2005-08-06T18:10:00.000+03:00

We don't have a red-light district in Bahrain, but I think the phrase "sheesha-smoke district" will catch on soon. There are many different places, and their number is growing, that are dark enough, packed with covered whores, and horny customers that come from lands near and far. Everyone just has a sit, smokes away, and scans the bluetooth device. You can see a free market of interaction. Foreign men giving out their numbers, and luring night girls calling themselves all kinds of fancy attractive names, on the device of course.

Why do we have that? Namely, Qataris can't wait to cash in their paychecks to come over here. If your weekend is Fridays and Saturdays, you can see them driving all over town. Either chasing girls, or going to one of these places where girls chase money. Its redicilus. Is it because these girls are needy? Maybe... maybe not.

Mis-Management

2005-08-04T12:55:00.000+03:00

WHAT THE FUCK WAS CALLING OFF THE VACATION ALL ABOUT?!?!
I mean, they said 3 days first, then they were like "oops.. changed our minds, we need you to come back tomorrow.." Is it like the dead fellow came back to life so you can cancell it? Did he like un-lid his grave and sit back on his wheelchair?
Its just redicilus! The Banks and the stockexchange were like a room full of deaf people taking directions from a blind man!
I understand that 5 days is too much... But the damage from this indecisiveness is BY FAR GREATER!! I mean how can you make payments to a counter-party that didnt get the message to come back to work this morning? Or how about my family members that left the stockexchange buy/sell orders hanging and went to dubai? Who's gonna pay us for the money we've lost?
BAD LEADERSHIP!!! You should've stuck to your guns! You made a mistake first, ok we understand. But changing gears like that threw us off-beat. You could've at least made the private sector come back to work on thursday, and announce it on the FIRST DAY, LOUD AND CLEAR, so most people at least can make arrangements to be there. Not call people the night before, "Ehh... I was wondering... would you like to show up tomorrow, or deduct it from your annual leave?"

I mean an error isnt a mistake, until you refuse to fix it. I mean what was hard about announcing the change of plan since the first day, and that thursday was the day back?

Offbeat: See you all at the bloggers' meetup. I might bring in a longtime reader, just not very familiar with the keyboard to leave comments :p

The King has left the building

2005-08-02T12:32:00.000+03:00

It took Saudi Arabia a full morning to confirm the King's death. I got a message close to 9, some people read it on the internet at 8, and others before that heard the Quran read on Saudi TV and assumed it at 6. The news was not confirmed until noon. Observers realize that he has passed away a while ago, but the Royal family had to draw the playing field and organize this and that in order to come close to a smooth transition. The royal family fued, terror threats, bitter-sweet relationship with America, and the Devout religious ideology has produced a secretive state that needs ten years to let go of a king (prince abdulla was the de facto ruler, and King Fahad was more of a string puppet, with his body parts pulled from upstairs to pretend he's moving.)

Lets compare that to Bill Clinton's ordeal. I mean when Kenneth Starr came out with the report that Mr. Clinton was in the oval office, with the door a bit open, getting "his penis stimulated" by miss Lewinsky, eating a slice of cold pizza, and on the phone with a congressman at 2 AM?!?!? First thing I thought of was what the fuck am I doing with my life? This guy doesnt have time for decent food or sex, just happy with the cold pizza and the fat chick while discussing welfare and labor reforms and I complain about waking up early? I mean it was humbling. The second thought I got was, isnt that taking the transparency thing too far? I mean, since when were the republicans the Taliban? Weren't they the party that favored individualism and privacy? Wasnt Raegen's slogan "get the government off my back?"

Anyway, back to topic. We have two pictures. The first is a pseudo-government that just bans the flow of information, unless it is pre-approved. Even then, it takes a whole morning to confirm the story from sources quoting sources. The second is a free flow of information, to the point that political figures are painfully not interesting, and people's lives are not interrupted by stopping the stream of live updates. I think the second bit is a healthier option.

Darwin Awards

2005-07-30T12:41:00.000+03:00

They are finally out again. You all know about the Darwin Awards. It's an annual honor given to the person who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way. Last year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which toppled over on top of him as he was attempting to tip a free soda out of it. The winner this year was actually painful to read. Not for the squeamish, it's the first time I can remember that the winner didn't actually die, but he won't be reproducing either, so the gene pool is safe. And the 2004 nominees are:

9. A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister.
8. A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of suffocation, according to police. He was approximately 6'2" tall and weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It appeared that he was trying to create a schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also wearing a military gas mask that had the filter canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its place. The other end of the hose was connected to one end of a hollow wooden tube approx. 12" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was inserted into his rectum for reasons unknown, and was the cause of his suffocation. Police found the task of explaining the circumstances of his death to his family very awkward.
7. Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles.
6. A police officer in Ohio responded to a 911 call. She had no details before arriving, except that someone had reported that his father was not breathing. Upon arrival, the officer found the man face down on the couch naked. When she rolled him over to check for a pulse and to start CPR, she noticed burn marks around his genitals. After the ambulance arrived and removed the man, who was declared dead on arrival at the hospital, the police made a closer inspection of the couch, and noticed that the man had made a hole between the cushions. Upon flipping the couch over, they discovered what had caused his death. Apparently, the man had a habit of putting his penis between the cushions, down into the hole and between two electrical sanders (with the sandpaper removed, for obvious reasons). According to the story, after his orgasm the discharge shorted out one of the sanders, electrocuting him.
5. A 27-year-old French woman lost control of her car on a highway near Marseilles and crashed into a tree, seriously injuring her passenger and killing herself. As a common place road accident, this would not have qualified for a Darwin nomination, were it not for the fact that the driver's attention had been distracted by her Tamagotchi key ring, which had started urgently beeping for food as she drove along. In an attempt to press the correct buttons to save the Tamagotchi's life, the woman lost her own.
4. A 22-year-old, Glade Drive, Reston, VA, man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped one end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground" Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major trauma."
3. A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend-no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate-was hospitalized.
2. Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building,extinguishing all potential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc. After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. The technician suspected of causing the blast had never been thought of as 'bright' by his peers.

The latest nominee for this year's Darwin Award (awarded to people for incredible feats of stupidity) goes to....

1. Based on a bet by the other members of his threesome, Everitt Sanchez tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez managed to straddle the ball washer and dangle his scrotum in the machine. Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the crank on the machine with Sanchez's scrotum in place, thus wedging them solidly in the mechanism. Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain, collapsed and tumbled from his perch. Unfortunately for Sanchez, the height of the ball washer was more than a foot higher off the ground than his testicles are in a normal stance, and the scrotum was the weakest link. Sanchez's scrotum was ripped open during the fall, and one testicle was plucked from him forever and remained in the ball washer, while the other testicle was pressed and flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the washer, and the rotating machinery inside. To add insult to injury, Sanchez broke a new $300.00 driver that he had just purchased from the pro shop, and was using to balance himself. Sanchez was rushed to the hospital for surgery, and the remaining threesome were asked to leave the course.

Is this the point of marrige?

2005-07-29T13:12:00.000+03:00

A very close friend of mine was telling me how hard it is for him to marry his sweetheart. He took on this DREADFUL job so he can save up and pay the "down-payment" for the rest of his life. He loves this girl to death, and love is his energy... like any young man, he is full of hope and is just pumped to get the most out of life and keep his better half happy for the rest of their time together. He works his fingers to the bone, and doesn't touch a fils out of his salary (although its not much for the effort) in order to give it off as a randsom to free the woman from her parents capture (traditional mahar) and ride away. His mother picked out this beautiful set of jewelry, and his fiónce just passed... not expensive enough apparently.
As they were closing the deal, and in order to start off on a high note, him and his family proposed a very good amount of money to end this chapter. Something over the market rate, if you can say so. The counterparty steamrolled them, using negotiation tecniques by the book, and demanded 150% of the initial offer. My friend talked to his fiónce about this. "Is this how we were planning to start off our life?" he asked. She started playing dumb and brushed off his concerns.." I don't know how this process is done.. talk to my mother" she replied.

What is this bullshit? We are at a point way past greed here. Are they seriously exchanging offers? How does someone bargain with his daughter's future? How can money become an issue like that? And from time to time, we have the audacity to comment about other cultures being materialistic, and ours being collective and strong-knit. I tell my friend, you ought to reconsider. You don't get to choose your natural parents, but you do get to choose your in-laws. Do you intentionally want to relate yourself to pan-faced bargain hunters like that? I know he loves her dearly, and she's the song in his heart bla bla bla... but if she really loved him, she could at least persuade her parents to loosen the rope around his neck.

I had an Omani friend.. he told me about the process in Oman. It is even more redicilus. When the man cannot afford the lumpsum initial offer (mahar) the father of the bride strikes a deal with him. He makes him get a loan of the maximum credit limit he can get, and the happy couple spend thier first years together paying it off! Unconditional love!

Offbeat: so the bonus I greatly opposed was given out. Apparently travel agencies were booking tickets and hotels left and right. I hope the good people of Thailand, Syria, Malaysia, and other countries that still allow Arabs through their borders, enjoy our wisely spent public funds.

Good old days

2005-07-27T18:12:00.000+03:00

Since Silver Girl put us in the mood, these pictures are for your viewing pleasure (in case you haven't seen them before.)

And not to be outdone, lets have a game going. Can you tell what each picture is? 1 point each

A job well done

2005-07-25T17:42:00.000+03:00

The headlines yesterday said that the Government is going to pay out 12 million BD in a single payment (bonus,) and an incrimental increase in government staff salaries of 18 million BD for the fiscal year 2005-2006. Simple math.. thats BD 30m. Usually a bonus is a reward for accomplishment. With the whole Malikiya wall, Ghada Jamsheer Trial, unemployed bash-o-thon parts 1 and 2, the suspension of the Bahraini fisherman law, and the MOI's website registration ( near and dear to this blogger's heart) I say WAY TO GO GUYS !! Thats a job well done !! We're aiming for a bigger bonus next year.

Lets drop the sarcasm now and talk some sense. What could Bahrain do with 30 million BD? First off, we can afford to not spend it on the folks that already have jobs. I mean, the traffic police, bless their heart, doing a very good job organizing traffic in the scorching heat... But I mean some lazy bums that take off 3 hours for the "noon prayer" when people need their beurocratic paperwork stamped... why should he get a 200 BD increase? We're talking close to zero productivity.

Isn't that money better spent in loans to small businesses? Hey, I'm going to hire some help, lower unemployment, try to pay it back, and things get moving around here. Just a fund that gives out loans... They can charge rates even close to retail banks, as long as they help out the Bahraini start-up entraprenuer. This guy is willing to work hard to PAY IT BACK, not sit on his ass all day demanding more pay for a job half done.

empty circle

2005-07-22T17:00:00.000+03:00

We clearly have lost focus. We need to pull out a big map to get a clue of the direction we should be moving to. Let us recap :

1. people outside the parliment were trying to throw eggs and tomatos at it
2. people inside the parliment were punching each other for not getting attention
3. the government was beating the people outside the parliment like they were pancakes
4. the people that boycotted the parliment are closing down

Now can someone please tell me what the fuck is going on here? Did anyone of the four groups in the political spectrum (government, mp's, angry mob, and political societies) make something rational so that I, and hopefully a number of citizens, can say " this person has made a good choice. I will listen to what they say, and I will pin hope on them to make good decisions from now on" ?

1. Angry Mob: Throwing eggs at an entity you didnt have faith in to begin with won't solve anything. please take this time to look for a job or take a night course. I know its hard, but what will your potential employer think of someone throwing food at a building?

2. MP's: Gentlemen, we get it. Half of you is furious at the situation, and the other half wants to please the government and the radicals. Now can we act as grown ups? Can the good ones manage and pull off another term until we boot out the fucked up fanatics next time around? Can you keep your hands to yourselves? Please?

3. Government: we've had enough of this bullcrap. We have a human rights record that makes Sudan blush. Do we really want to keep up with this? We know that a (higher up official) cant go to England or any major europian country because the human rights activists will give him a piece of their mind. The Bahrain representative at the human rights meeting last month was sweating like a pig that weekend. Do we really want to make it harder on ourselves?

4. Wifaq & co.: so the parliment is capable of something after all, isnt it? What do you think now of the "mouthpiece that doesnt have any authority?" Is that what you wanted? half the people shy off the voting polls so the votes skew to the longest beard? You know what I think? Serves you right. Next time around, work on something workable rather than offer nothing and expect change to the better.

News Make-over

2005-07-20T20:18:00.000+03:00

So the newsroom at Bahrain TV got a makeover, but it was the material was the same ass-kissing, half-truths, irrelivant and selective news.
I guess you can dress up a pig in a tuxedo but he's still a pig!

Big problem, obvious solution.

2005-07-17T17:50:00.000+03:00

So the unemployed got beaten up again. I'm not getting into who is right, and what could've been, since most of you have reached your own opinions already. I will rather use my gift of common sense to identify the problem and propose a solution.

The Problem: We have a government that was afraid of getting pushed off the rocker for more than 30 years. Rather than investing in infrastructure, capital markets, labor market, and natural resources; it chose to buy bigger guns, hire more policemen from different countries, and smooched off money for security in case - god forbid- something happened.

The Solution: So the oil business (bapco), ALBA (aluminium), Batelco (telecommunications), Gulf Air (aviation), NBB, the sea ports, and pretty much most of the "private" sector is owned and run by the government. Since we dont have taxes in Bahrain (direct distribution of wealth,) why don't they cut out some government expenditures (like overstaffed police, fat government contracts, entities we dont really need like the ministry of "information," and sending paychecks to some folks just because they belong to a certain clan.) Its not as easy as I make it look. Now you're asking, how is the transition period? Here is the trick. Since all the money is still funneled through the government, the EDB or any other capable agency can launch ventures. Not necessarily profit maximizing, like real estate thats apparently selling like hot cake right now, but long term stability and growth projects. Something like the International Circuit or ALBA. The government's capital reserve can serve as an incubator until they start picking up, and then offered for public ownership by listing (selling) shares for people like you and me, for a PROFIT!! We own more of Alba and Bapco; they have extra money to re-invest in other projects and infrastructure to sell off, and more people are hired to keep these projects going.

By then no one will need to hire forces to beat up the unemployed, because they will be in a factory somewhere rather than throwing stuff at the parliment.

Strong, Independent, Women.

2005-07-14T19:23:00.000+03:00

Every morning, before I sit on my chair at the office, I prepare a cup of instant coffee. If I walk in the kitchen and this girl in particular is in there (and its a big kitchen,) she shivers; which puts me in a very awkward and eerie situation. I feel very uncomfortable around her, since she uses all her conscious senses in an effort to avoid getting close to me. After a couple of instances, I just head back until she is done so I can make my cup of coffee and avoid the awkward silence. The poor woman is conditioned psychologically to feel that men are packs of wolves. My assumption is that our culture devides the genders socially to the point that she feels if she touches me by mistake, she is pretty much damaged goods.

Another situation that makes me very uncomfortable is when I am introduced to a lady. I hesitate to shake hands. If I dont, and she expected me to, Im retarded; If I extend my hand and she doesnt shake hands, Im embarrassed.

I dont know what is it exactly. My guess is women have much less rights; and they are cognitively taught through involvement and perception, that they basically take the back seat. Anything they say or do can be used against them, since men are responsible for keeping women in line.

Like in Saudi, women cant go anywhere without a male relative. The only word I can think of is
dependant. The Mullas (religious regulators) always warn from Women being alone, and the necessity of a male relative to make sure burning sexual desires are repressed, and that women dont run off with strange men. Im sure all of you heard about the fatwa that women can log on the internet only when a man is present.

Why dont we have many Ghada Jamsheers and Nada Hafath's? And not one single elected female in any office?

In my opinion, one of the reasons we dont have many women leaders, is because men are more comfortable with each other. I can have a friendly (man-to-man) conversation with my superiors. It does not have to be about work. It can be about football, vacation, how much I hate someone... anything ( if they're in a good mood.) Ladies, on the other hand, are limited to discussing work and nothing else. If they carry a friendly conversation with a man, they might be seen as flirty sluts. This barrier limits her access to little tips and skills that a man like me gets from more experienced individuals, since there is more interaction. When managerial vacancies and promotions come around, guess who's more likely to get them? Good old joker, thats not the sharpest tool in the shed, but picked up some tricks of the trade? Or the shy girl that hides behind her files and I cant remember her name?

Bottom line is, I believe that if women can easily approach men, and had more space to be independent, they will be much better off.

Thou shalt not kill

2005-07-11T19:04:00.000+03:00

In Protestant, Catholic and Hebrew testaments, one of the ten commandments is thou shall not kill. Islam also takes a very clear stand on murder is not allowed without "probable cause." I can't think of a religion that doesn't criminalize murder. Well, when you come to think of it, most wars and deaths in the world happened for God... starting with the Roman Empire, Islamic Jihad, crusades, WW II, 9-11, and whats in between.... So we cant really take the religious folks very seriously in that department can we?

I say enough with that "the terrorists have a distorted view of islam, and thats why the west has a distorted view of us," and face the problem.

We need to get rid of that mono view system we have in place. You have one person, that people assume has a clean soul and devine wisdom, telling them what to do. We have authoritarian regiems. These unilateral regiems are backed with 1 religious view about much of everything, so if you are arguing with that man that wants to stay in power, you are basically arguing with god.

The young men that flew straight into concrete and metal on that september morning were not angry at the United States. They were angry and frustrated with their own situation... They never had the chance to voice their view in order to progress collectively.... All they got was a single tone message telling them: "the United States is the cause of your misery, and if you dont believe me, the quran right here said that 1,400 years ago." And since these societies didnt use the young mens' input and potential to develop any advancements, NOT EVEN WEAPONS (major necessity to them,) they decide to use the only thing they're left with; their bodies.